The Fable, The Super Mario, and The Fun Had By All…

It’s Sunday and I like to post uplifting posts on Sunday; well, I like to be uplifting any day of the week, but I seem to be making a Sunday habit of posting today and that’s probably because I’m well rested and off work on Sunday; plus, its always quiet in my apartment on this day of the week.  And so…

This is where I’m going:  One of  my best buds in the world had a birthday yesterday and she was a bit down.  She’s had a very rough previous year and things just kept piling up.  Needless to say, her birthday would have been awash in wine and couch time with her puppies, or simply mulling over the past and sadness.  That’s a horrible way to spend a birthday.  So, we hung out and went to an art show in Dallas and she climbed a scaffolding (fortunately, no police were around) and took awesome photos, since she’s a photographer, and we ate food we’d never tried before, Bhan Mi, and then we drank Vietnamese coffees, and then went back to her place and I sliced my thumb horribly cutting tangerines to place in our Blue Moon Pumpkin Ales, which hurt like hell and bled like a Julia Child skit from SNL. But at least we had a good time.

And then Saturday night we went to a Halloween party thrown by a lesbian meet-up group with another good friend and all of us had a very, very good time.  A lot of lesbians attended and the woman I actually liked happened to be straight – ah well, thatsa how it goes.  I also met a cool hip-hop rapper who is extremely talented, and quite a few other women, one even tried to teach me how to dance.  I still suck at it and still dance like Elaine Bettis from Seinfeld.  They were all so sweet and nice and it was simply fun.  I dressed as Mario, the guy you like to play with.  Haha, badum!

Its’a me…Mario!

(Don’t pay attention to the fact I took that photo in the bathroom.  It had the best mirror.)

Helloooo!

The final product had yellow buttons.  It was a fun costume, and a good time was had by all.

Anyhoo, I wrote a little fable, Stop and Look Up, to cheer up my friend and edited it a bit and thought I’d place it here for your enjoyment.  When I was a kid I loved Aesop’s Fables.  And the thing about fables, they can have a little nugget of wisdom and truth within them, and sometimes you might not even realize it until days or years later, but they are fun to have around.  Please enjoy, and, as always, there is a surprise Youtube video at the end of the post. *winkwink*

Stop and Look Up…the Fable

Once there was a person – male or female, it doesn’t really matter.  We will call this person, Bob Chuck.

Bob Chuck walked up a hill – no, maybe a mountain – and it was a rough climb. All kinds of hardships to simply climb up a fuckin’ mountain – bears and lions, ohmyyy, weather, sprained ankles, broken nails, ripped pants, and not a bath in sight.  Bob Chuck grumbled for the most part of his/her climb.  (I’ll just call Bob Chuck a “her” for semblance.)

And so she finally gets to the top of the mountain.  And she’s all, “Whoa, what a pisser climbing up to the top of this fuckin’ mountain.”  And “blah blah blah” – yes, she said that.

Whilst during the rant of perpetual complaint a voice – no, someone humming a tune –  came from the bushes.  Upon further inspection she saw a cave and noticed a fire.  There were lush orchards around the cave and plenty of good smells, so she wandered over and there was a hermit there with two plates; one for her and one for him.

He picked up her plate, handed it to Bob Chuck and then stood at the edge of the mountain beside her and said, “Hi!  Beautiful view, eh?”  (The mountain hermit was obviously Canadian.)

And so, Bob Chuck finally stopped complaining and stopped and looked out at the view.  The beauty was almost more than she could handle and she nearly dropped her plate.  She could see for miles and miles and miles and miles and miles…and more, oh yeah.

“THIS IS SOOOOOOO AWESOME!” Bob Chuck suddenly – and surprisingly – yelled, so that the echo nearly caused an avalanche.

Her hospitable host chuckled lightly and Bob Chuck stayed and lived with the hermit for many years, enjoying her hospitality. (Yes, I changed the hermit to a “her” because the hermit didn’t care to choose one gender or another.  She didn’t care…nor, did he.)

Bob Chuck soon became restless and decided it was time to leave the mountaintop and the hermit, and so she packed up her stuff and left with a quick, “Adios Padre, I feel the wind and it calls Mariah.”

“But your name is…”

“Let’s not get stuck on pleasantries, shall we?”

And Bob Chuck left the mountaintop and began her climb back down.  The trip down was even more arduous than the climb up.  It rained much more, and she fell down a few feet through mud and shit, and leaves just don’t cut it.  It was just a really hard trip, and with each passing day she’d forget a little more of the beautiful view and time on the mountaintop.  Until she finally came to the valley below and lived among the other people and began to listen to their words and their lives and became more and more forgetful of the beauty and time of the mountaintop.  Grumbling soon became her favorite past time, along with the townsfolk.

And then one day, as she was washing some underwear and hanging it on a clothesline, the hermit walked by and said, “Hi, beautiful view, eh?”

And she stopped, as he handed her a donut and a cup of coffee and looked up.  She stopped and looked up at the mountain and its beauty for the first time.

“AWESOME!”  Bob Chuck shouted, this time dropping her donut, and cup of coffee, and her voice echoed so that…

(And you decide the ending, my friends.)

1. The avalanche came crashing down and killed all the people of the valley.   Good riddance grumblers.
2. The echo reverberated across the land and the people all stopped to look up and enjoyed the beauty of the mountain for the first time.
3. Bob Chuck and Hermit hooked up and had a merry time of wine and drink while partying with the townsfolk.
4. You don’t care because you know that if you were Bob Chuck you would have never left the mountaintop.
5. You realize there are many endings to every story when you are living it, and so, “AWESOME, what a beautiful view!”

The End

Have a Happy Sunday of wine, merriment, and whatever else you enjoy. 🙂  I’m going to take a nap.  I was up all night partying with my friends at a Halloween party and there are still funny little black pieces of material stuck up my nose from that Mario mustache. Doodoodoodoodoodoo…WooHoo!  *wink*

Haha, the guy we love to play with… ^___^ WooHoo!

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The Lesbian Persona(fiction)…or Nice Dudes Finish Last..?

I am now a member of the elite class known as “lesbian.”

I have joined the club.

I think…?  Mostly, I think I now know what myriad “nice guys” feel about women: utterly and totally confused.

I’ll admit I’m a bit of a dude lesbian.  I’m still quite feminine in my maternal way, but I’m also very laidback and a dude in my casual and easygoing way.  As you will note in my ordination as a Dudeist Priest:

Cool enough for a Fender Strat posing!

Thanks to one of my best buds in the world, Maeve, she has ordained me in the Church of Latter Day Dudes (The Big Lebowski).

See? John Goodman makes it official

I laughed when she gave me this and it was possibly one of the sweetest presents I’ve ever received. ^__^

However, there is something I’ve learned about lesbians in this last year.  Now understand, I’m a newbie lesbian and I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed.  I’m more of the utilitarian little pocket knife.

Case in point:  Meet a woman.  Fall madly in love: first love and the love of your life.  She breaks your heart.  You rebound with another woman.  Fall in love…ish?  You break her heart (or, just break up) because you are not over the first woman.  You then start dating because you are lonely and miss cuddling and… other things…cause new lesbianism is a whole new experience and you are enjoying the experience, ya know?  (And you might possibly be like a dude and like women.)  You find out there is a code of similarities that all lesbians do.  Who knew?  If you are a clueless type like me you consistently break the code and act like a dufus around the cool lesbians.

I am a dork.  Just an up front note for you all, I am a major dork and nerd.

You find there are lesbians who are looking for a soul mate (which leads to scary proclamations of LOVE within a few shared messages and makes you think you’ve entered crazy land) and then the cool lesbians who think you are a dork upon first meeting, write you off and never speak to you again because you’re a dork.

…

I met a few of those and believe me; I was all but ready to hand over my lesbian card to them, throw my hands up and yell, “Yes it’s true! I’m a fake!” and then run along crying and whimpering like a little girl.  Is this what happens to guys?

Along with my total neurosis with feelings of ineptitude in daily situations, I was also picked on a quite a bit in high school.  I just don’t do the cool thing well.  I have begun to feel like I’m back in high school, waiting for an apple to be thrown at the back of my head, my lunch tray kicked so the food falls in a heap by my feet, or my books to be grabbed and tossed to the floor.  (You know, I still wonder why all the kids picked on me at school – so weird.  They said I looked funny.)

That’s almost embarrassing…

Really?  I really don’t look like that, but I was having a bad hair day, as well as dressed poorly for work, and those glasses do nothing for me when I pose that way, and damn I have big nostrils….

…

And so, another friend told me that giving a flower on a date is very “lesbian.”

Aww a flower from my daughter, and she’s not a lesbian

Who knew?

I never read the code book.  Drinking coffee?  Lesbian.  Dogs?  Lesbian.  Cats?  Lesbian and many straight girls.  Music?  Oh wow, there is a whole bunch of lesbian musicians that all lesbians listen to:  Ani Difranco, Melissa Etheridge (a must), The Indigo Girls, Tegan and Sara, and quite a few others….  And if you haven’t listened to, nor have any of these on your iPod, you will have this stunned look of surprise by lesbians that question your orientation.  This is worthy of handing over your lesbian card in and of itself.  They already question me for being in a heterosexual marriage for over 20 years, and some of the looks make you think they suspect you of counter-espionage.  But, to be clear, I simply have a high pain tolerance and am quite a bit stronger than my barely over five foot person may look.

I either do or don’t do things that lesbians do and I’m finding out there is this whole other culture, like I’ve stepped onto an undiscovered island and I’m just trying to acclimate to their way of life and speak their tongue.  (Speaking of tongues, you realize lesbians are really good kissers.)  (But I digress…. But yes, lesbians have amazing tongues – just sayin…. Anyone else feel like a taco? *winkwink*)

(Badum – oh yes, I went there!)

I realized as I met with a lifelong lesbian that I just don’t “get it.”  I didn’t know you were supposed to do things a certain way, nor did I know I wasn’t supposed to do things a certain way.  You dress a certain way, and you certainly don’t wear that!  You have a lesbian vernacular.  You have secret handshakes (no, haha, I made that up… and I pretty much make up a lot of what I write – but, go with it).

I thought I could simply be the person I am and have no tags other than “Me.”  But apparently that is not the case in the lesbian dating world.

I ended up writing a song in my consternation with lesbianism and it’s called, Had Enough.  (That, and it had a theme that I thought would sound cool for my first country song.)  It was a compilation of feelings I’ve had for months and then this last discussion with two of my friends who have basically ‘had enough’ of crazy lesbian chicks.  One woman is getting texts that proclaim how she dreamed of them sharing “I do’s” on a beach and that dream has been ruined because her texts are not being returned.  (Well YEAH, she’s kind of gone bat-shit cwazy cwackers on her!) To which my friend told me, “What. The. Fuck?”  They had only shared a couple of dates.  Another friend of mine has a woman who wants to be with her and then doesn’t and has been doing this for years.  I can attest to knowing a woman who self hates and loathes that she’s a lesbian and just can’t seem to shake this self-loathing.  Why?  She thinks God will disown her because of her gayness.  That makes no sense.  What God is she following?  I don’t know this God of hers, but she seems pretty set on this premise that homosexuality is the only sin that gives you a one way ticket to hell.  That is simply mind-boggling… but also quite saddening.

In fact, it’s why I still keep writing on this blog.  If only one woman can realize God loves you and doesn’t hate you for being gay then I am happy to oblige your misunderstanding of God.  God is love – end and beginning of your story.

And then I look at myself and see I am a person who has possibly made someone think they’ve had enough.  I can run hot and then cold quite easily and yes, that could be blamed on my neurosis and randomness, or hot flashes, but I honestly recover quite quickly since I’m like the most easygoing person you will ever meet.  I really don’t lie when I say you can pretty much do anything to me and I will forgive you.  Mercy is my middle name (no, it’s ‘Hope,’ but you get the gist).

You tell me, “Hey, stop acting stupid,” and more than likely I’ll smile, perk up a brow (like I’m doing in my photo over at the side) and say, “Really?  Wow.  Are you sure?”  To which they answer, “Yes.  You’re reading too much into this and over thinking.”  One of my best buds is great at shaking the stupid out of me in this way.  Haha.  I’ll shake the cobwebs of misunderstanding out of my head and realize I was acting stupid, or possibly just lost in thoughts of my ex again.

(My ex is someone who invades and pervades my thoughts a lot these days.  It’s been exactly one year and I’m still not over her.  Why is that?  Is this love or obsession?  I’m pretty sure its messing up any love life I have now.  I’ve basically spent this South Africa anniversary week – it been exactly one year ago I traveled there – in a fog and random fits of tears.)

(Wow….)

(Sighhhhh….)

(I’m just very sad….)

Time for an iconic corny 80s video to sing along with…

Ah, one of the most popular and best known vids of the time (I’ll post the original at the end).

Anyhoo, on with this discussion, it is that you’ll find when you meet a new lesbian she will either fall madly in love with you or hate you for only one misstep.  It’s not like having a best friend.  It’s like having a new worst enemy.  It can happen in moments.  I can’t say this is always the case, but I’m finding it to be a common case.

I barely blinked once and lost a friend over what?  I’m not sure.  I honestly wish I knew how the lesbian mind thinks.

And then another woman still talks to me…but doesn’t?  I’m not sure.  This is a conundrum that I won’t go into.

And so how do I just be “me” and the person I am and wade through this new life as a lesbian?  I’ve given up on dating…sorta.  I’m not a Catholic Priest, I’m a Dudeist Priest after all, and that’s so different.

I am hoping to simply enjoy the people who like me for me and be kind to everyone else and then organically some woman if she comes into my life will simply be there and I will know.  I have my moments, but I don’t wallow in those moments.

I need to stop thinking and reading too much into relationships.  Come what may is not a bad mantra: Love, be kind, and not judge.  I do have a tendency to judge a situation or person too easily.  I am probably reading more into something than there is to read.  It’s my crazy imagination again.  Thus the name of this post, “Persona(fiction?),” because that is my own fictional thoughts and world entering my real life.

Oh my gosh, am I becoming a crazy lesbian?

Nah, I’m an ordained Dudeist Priest, baby! 😉

In all seriousness, just be you and people will love you for who you are and if they don’t then they aren’t people worth having in your life.  I have the most awesome friends and kids, and some friends that are like my kids, that I love so much.  I’m having the best part of my life right now, and it gets better in life all the time.  You start growing up and the world grows around you in all types of ways.  But you really have to know love, and know how to love yourself.  I’m guessing you are a pretty awesome person to know too.

So, be happy and chill dudes!

Onto other random things…

Good Books in a Good Life…

I just finished reading a very good book.  This one was written by a modern day heretic.  No, he’s not a heretic, but he has been labeled that by the ‘established’ religion of our time called Christianity.  His name is Bishop Carlton Pearson and he has truly been enlightened by God.  I loved this book.  I’ve gleaned some great talking points and insight.  It’s titled, The Gospel of Inclusion.  I think everyone should read this book, and as one reviewer, Arun Ghandi, proclaimed, “A book for all sane people to read and digest.”  Again, I have to thank my ex, Willow, for buying this book for me to read.  She was right – it’s very, very good.

She’s a cool lesbian but has enough dork in her to actually like me.

You realize with thinking comes questions and then comes understanding.  God is brilliant.  God is not stuffed into a bunch of pages, but God is everywhere and when you continue searching you continue knowing more and more.  It really doesn’t stop.  I wish I could shake so many people who have ended their quest and tell them, “No!  No, it’s just begun!  If you still have breath then you still have a brain, and so use it and continue wondering and thinking and asking because that’s when you find truth.”

I love that the Spirit of God lives in me and never stops prodding me forth to know my God more fully every day.

Jesus Christ had a message that has been so lost and fuddled to near extinction.  The church we know and religion wrote their doctrines and stamped their creeds and left it to die in the grave of the past.  We need to move forward and progress.  Tradition does nothing but tells you that you’ve already made it and need look no further, but that is such a horrible lie to tell yourself.  God is active.  God is alive.  He didn’t die thousands of years ago in an ancient text, or on a cross.  He spoke, yes, but He also gave a cornerstone to build upon.  You don’t ever leave a building to just sit and crumble.  You continue to maintain it and add rooms as the family grows and you sometimes knock down walls that are no longer fit and rebuild better walls.  You don’t simply let it sit there and fall apart.

Religion is dead.  Christ is alive.  Churches falter.  God’s Spirit has no fault.  Who is more worthy to listen to?  A dead religion or a living God?

I’ll leave you with these words from, The Gospel of Inclusion.  There were so many great quotes and I couldn’t possibly fit them all here on a blog, but I’ll share these last words on why it’s so important for us to preach a gospel of love and not hate. This is a message worth sharing:

For the true Christian, evangelizing should begin with oneself, being born again with each new day, conveying the message of hope, and recreating this world as a place of love, compassion, preservation of beauty, respect for nature and peace; peace and love above all else.

We owe it to God and ourselves to enter a covenant of love with every experience and encounter. The word “neighbor” consists of two English words that mean “near by.”  Loving your neighbor means loving everyone and everything you encounter without condition.  Everything you experience has love in it somewhere.  Each encounter exposes part of the self you must love, because each encounter reveals more of the essence of who you really are.  Life is good.  Life is God.  He does not reside in a church, a Bible, a doctrine, or a sermon.  He resides in you and me and every one of us.  We are each a church. Christ resides in each of us, if we can find the wisdom to see Him.

 (Bishop Carlton Pearson, pg. 209, The Gospel of Inclusion)

Be blessed amigos and peace out!  (And the “original” Whitesnake video for your enjoyment.)

South Africa and…I’m Unabashedly Corny because I’m adding a Poem, “Under the Full Moon’s Sky”

I have to comment on an earlier post.  I’ve since edited the post, “Where Do I Begin,” (It was the Feb. 15th post) and hope that it appeases some who I may have upset.  I think you know who you are, but I do apologize and won’t comment any further.

This month, I am coming up on a year anniversary of when I stayed in South Africa, April 29th to May 19th (the day before her birthday) where I met and fell in love with someone so special there are no words to describe her beauty inside and out.

Recently, I’ve had several dreams about the people of that country (always her in the distance) and I’ve awoken feeling… bothered?  I have this morose that has come over me and sadness.  I’m not sure why.  Is it a psychic thing or simply that subconsciously this anniversary is plaguing my thoughts?  Does she now hate me?  Is this God telling me it’s time to move on?  I really don’t know.

The thing is – does it even matter?

I need to move on with my life.  I know this.  Deep down…I know this is how it must be.  Toto songs, not withstanding, I have to get past Africa.

Sorry, I just had to place the song, haha.  It’s catchy and it’s karaoke version! ^^

Anyhoo, my love will not die, but my life will go on as Celine Dion has sang…

Sigh… yes, I have to place this song too.

This is actually a favorite song that was newly introduced to me by a woman I have very deep feelings for in another state.  (She is so damn cute!)  I can’t help myself because I find I fall for women that are near, far and wherever they are – women are simply too awesome to stop loving.

And so, yes, I am a corny romantic.  I was playing my guitar and sharing music with another singer/songwriter (a very lovely and attractive lesbian with big blue eyes, that if I was smart I would fall in love with her, but… time will tell because she is also a fire sign and as you who have ever looked up zodiac signs knows: fire + fire = HOT).

And where was I?

Oh yes, I have been told to move on.  My heart will go on.  South Africa will always hold a piece of my heart and soul.  My love is not lost and my phone number is the same… just sayin…. haha

Thank you to my Twin (she knows who she is) and my good friends that steer me in the right direction, like the one who is the well-balanced Libra that loaned me her Nag Hammadi (which has some really awesome writings like the Gospel of Truth – my fave so far), who remind me when I get overwhelmed by sadness because my heart will always love that one woman in South Africa (but I know it’s not meant to be) that I have a life path that is blessed and worth living…and not with her.

I am truly blessed with beautiful children and very good friends and a life that just keeps getting better and better on this sojourn.  God, if you seek with all your heart and soul, is found.

God is truly my greatest love and because of this fact, I know my heart will go on and on and on.  Without seeking you are lost.  God loves.  God loves you.  My passion and love I realize has always had the end game to God and so…I hope you will all be blessed by such a great love.  I have loved and been loved by wonderful people in my life and I know this is only the beginning.  It’s only the beginning for all of you too. 😉

And Now the Poetry…

Under the Full Moon’s Sky

I want to sit under the full moon on a park bench with you

I’d sit beside you and we wouldn’t speak

My arm would carefully lie across the back of the bench, never touching

Knowing it would stay there, lounging like a giant iguana in the sun

Basking in the light of the full moon’s face

We’d be near, but never close

My personal space would touch the edge of your personal space

My hand would grip the back of the park bench

The heat of your body, always so warm, would emanate and touch my hand

I would grasp the air so tightly, but would never feel its source

We’d watch the moon for hours

Elapsing of time would change because of where it would sit in the sky

Clouds would pass and change the view

At times it would be covered, and other times only nipped at the edges, and then

It would peek out until it would appear gloriously in its fullness and we’d sit

Quietly… quietly and watching it

I’d sing songs in my head to you, “I love you… I love you….”

Songs you’ll never hear

Your skin always smells faintly of berries and smoke, and Dove soap

With just a touch of skin, powdery and fresh

I love your smell even when you tell me you haven’t bathed for days

Everything about you is alluring

As we watch, the moon passes through the night sky

We sit, never touching, only feeling that I’ve seen beauty

But knowing I’ll never hold this beauty and only admire it in the distance

Until it sinks behind the horizon and the sun takes its place

Another day… without you

The Thank-full Post

[Posting this a day later, but not for a dollar shorter.  I wrote it yesterday while lounging about.  I took Thanksgiving off and laid around, watched some TV shows on Netflix with my girl (catching up on Raising Hope and How I Met Your Mother), and ate things that are bad for me.  You know, like most of America?  Haha, oh wow, that sounded like I ate “most of America.”  Hmm… I would seriously need to hit the gym then, eh? 😀   

Oh yeah, so here is the post from yesterday…]

I’m on Face Time (a cool face-to-face phone call feature that two people with iPhone’s can talk for hours on and it’s almost like they are in the same room — but not) with my girlfriend and both of us are alone and in different states and so it’s not like we can cuddle or anything, which is kind of a bummer – a big bummer – but we’re making do and I told her I wanted to write a blog post today and so she told me (minister that she is) to write a post about what I’m thankful for…and so here goes:

1. I’m having an awesome hair day – really.  And so is Willow.  We just wake up and our hair amazingly falls into place.

(not a pic from today… but I’m too lazy to post a new one – close enough.  I hadn’t showered in this pic either.  This was taken while I was in San Francisco.)

2. I am alone on Thanksgiving Day and that means I don’t have to take part in the mass murder of turkeys because, why make a turkey for just me?

It’s like he’s staring right at you and crying, “I don’t want to die!”  And it also looks like he’s wearing an 18th century parliamentary wig dyed red.  He’s a fashionable turkey.

3. My kids (Lisbeth and her beau after traveling between families, and Johann) will all get together with me and we will have quesadillas with chicken.  Okay, they are technically fowl too, but…uh… at least I will finally have some avocados.  I LOVE avocados and that’s what I am especially thankful for, and cheese.  Cheese DOES make everything better.

4. I have a wonderful girlfriend who understands I have many sides (she says multifaceted)  and serious about my spirituality and family.  She REALLY  loves me.  I’m actually amazed with that fact, since I’m very non-committal (mostly because of my last girlfriend) and um…weird.

5. My health is pretty good for a woman about to make the first turn past living half a century.

6. I have a job.

7. I am loved by God, my girlfriend, my friends and family, and random people (some call them stalkers, but I prefer the term “fans”).

8. I am reading some really awesome books and don’t have enough time to feed my brain with all these awesome books.  That is so cool!  I finally finished reading the writings of Hans Denck (how obscure is that?).

8. I have food and a home.  There are many who still are without this wonderful blessing.  (Please consider giving a little more this year, if you do happen to have when so many others do not have.)

9. I’m thankful for my dogs: Comet, Fuzzy and Jake

10. My country is diverse and free for the most part.  It was a good election and for the first time (thanks to my politico and activist girlfriend) I was quite involved at watching the campaigns closely.  It made me feel a part of the process, as skewed and crazy as it is.

…voting into the wee hours of the night

11. I am an honestly happy person.

12. I finally got a decent grade on one of my anthropology papers.  Woo!

13. The sky is beautiful this time of year.  Orion is present again, and I love seeing this constellation.

14. Life is pretty good.

That’s it for now.  I am sure I could be thankful for so much more, but I have to end this post at a reasonable length.  And so…

Is your “thank-tank” full?

The best part of Thanksgiving is that so many people reflect on the good things they have and are blessed with and then I can read all these posts and watch these videos, and also realize we humans live during an awesome time period in history.

Yes, this American holiday is a day of turkey mass  murder and recalling when ancestors murdered a bunch of indigent people who were simply trying to figure out these white-skinned strangers; but hey that’s the thing about history – it’s the past and life is pretty much what you make of the present.

Since no one can change the past, we can certainly work on effecting the future of our planet, our fellow earth dwellers, and working on being better and being a human that loves and gives.

God is good and because He is so good we can be good too and really be part of the blessing.  Yep, life is good.  Please feel free to share in the comments your blessings and thank-full thoughts too.

Happy Belated Thanksgiving Day!

 

Dogs Who Walk Dogs & Hunting/Sporting Store? Double Header Post!

This post will have a bit of absurdity.

Part I:  Dogs Who Walk Dogs

I had mentioned in an earlier random post that I was going to let my smaller, more skirmish dog, walk my other dog to save me the trouble of having to wake up before 8 a.m.  You see, I am a night owl.

Well, I wouldn’t really just throw my dogs out the door of my apartment at 7:30 in the morning and let them walk themselves, that would be cruel and unusually harmful to my baby pups.

BUT, this is too good of a photo opportunity.

I tied their leashes together just before heading up the stairs to my apartment after we went for our evening walk.

This doesn’t seem like a very good idea mom.

As you can see, Comet is not very willing.

He hemmed and hawed until Fuzzy seemed to tell him to just let her lead, and then he looked back…

Help?

Fuzzy wanted to go home.  Once she’s done her doggy business, she’s pretty much ready to go back home; unlike Comet who likes to check around and sniff, and then pee and mark his territory.  (Such a male thing in any part of the animal kingdom, eh?)

And then Fuzzy persuaded him after whispering in his ear.  (She really does that – eerie.)

Discussing treats upon their return won Comet over.

Do any of you remember this dog, Sam Sheepdog, from the old Warner Bros. cartoons?

Comet is the embodiment of this character.  He pretty much goes along with whatever the one in charge tells him, and usually with his tail wagging full throttle and happy to serve.  But, he’s no dummy – he just has an insatiable appetite.

I was sure to hold their leashes as they made it up the stairs and then took a photo of them on the landing.

Home safe.

Treats!  Wagging his tail wildly!

Overall, Fuzzy seemed in total control and Comet seemed to eventually  just listen to her.  One would wonder what Fuzzy really thinks about through her day…

Mwahahahahahaha World domination, silly humans.

This is a two-parter post, so here is Part II!

Part II: “Johann and I went to a Sporting Goods/Hunting Store – mostly “Hunting” Store and…”

Since I don’t want a lawsuit, I will refrain from naming ‘said’ store, but it was a very large place marketed to consumer consumption of all things that kill other things.

Wall to wall taxidermy animals were the norm.  I mean, there had to have been a small forest worth of creatures’ heads hanging on the walls in this department store.  They came in all shapes and sizes and this is barely walking in the door.  Believe me, the rest of the store had many, many more animal heads and bodies, as you will see.

Greetings!  What would you like to kill?

And then my son and I looked to our right side upon entering and there was a few random little things for the kids.

Suck on this lollipop kiddos!

Reindeer riding the rainbow stick.  Wow…just…wow.  My son, Johann, and I nearly bought it just for the giggles.  Taste the rainbow little reindeer!  (And that little reindeer is very cute.)

Needless to say, I didn’t buy it.  I did, however, see something that I’d not seen before.

Camo-Bibles! Both spiritual and practical

Really?

The hunting store has a kid section and this is what they have.  Rainbow riding reindeer lollipops and camo-Bibles for the kids as they use their special little rifles. (THEY HAVE KID-SIZE GUNS!) (AND THEY COME IN PINK!)  (KID SIZE GUNS!)  Sorry, I’m just not a hunter-type.

Do kids really need to have the word of God on hand while they’re out hunting down a few of God’s creatures?  It’s good the parents are watching out for their spiritual life, while teaching them the glory of killing things.  I tell you, Texas raises a special breed of Christian.  Gun in one hand and Bible in the other – it’s true!  I thought it was just a liberal propaganda campaign, but this store was full of families with small children!

Who knew?

[Small Disclaimer:  This is all in jest because I believe people have the freedom to hunt and call it sport and all of this stuff is part of America, and I’m cool with that, but I do have an opinion.

I just know I don’t like guns used for killing animals under the guise of calling it a sport.  If you have to hunt to live, I understand, but for sport?  It boggles my mind.  I guess I was taken back in this store because as you will see, it gets absurdly better…?]

And then my son and I walked toward the fishing area because they had some cool shorts I was checking out (lots of pockets and I love pockets), and then I look up and see this bear staring down at me.

SHITOHMIGHTYMOTHEROFFUGGGGGGINWHATTHEHECKISTHAT?!

Hey! Hey lady! I’m stuck in the middle of this store!

Oh, it’s okay, he’s just a dead stuffed bear like all the other creatures here.  Schwoo!

We quickly departed the fishing section, which honestly, how many types of fishing poles are needed?  It took up half the store.  The other half was taken up by guns.  (As you will later read about, since I was possibly too disgusted to take pics of row upon row of guns.)

We walked past this display, nicely done cliffs with mountain goats or something-or-other hanging around.  I’m pretty sure these ones weren’t real, but I couldn’t really be sure since I’m no taxidermy expert.

Yodel-lay-hee-hoo!

More fishing poles too!

They had a tunnel under the mountain goat/ram/antelope display which was kind’a cool – like we were playing putt-putt golf.  Along the inside wall they had a large aquarium with these guys.

Meow fish

And two REALLY BIG catfish

I can’t breathe…under you…Carl Catfish

See the mouth of the other catfish?  That one big guy was sitting on the other fish’s head.  Here’s his mouth.

blugbugbluh…help

We finally emerged from the tunnel and what to my wondrous eyes should appear, but rows of arrows and bows.  (But no pics.)  Again, I was a little in awe of all the different weapons.  And yeah, bows and crossbows and hunting knives I actually find kind of cool.  And, they are necessary during a zombie invasion.

…seriously.

And so we made our way to the other half of the store and something weird came into view.  This had to be a practical joke.

Oh yeahhhhhh, like that baby

This is a store for hunters, right?

…

*blinkblink*

There are really no words.  My son and I couldn’t stop laughing at the display.

I know this is supposed to show the glory of the hunt, but it seemed subliminally erotic.  Is that what using your gun is all about? o.O

Anyhoo, we made it to the gun half of the store and there were so many guns I stood there for a moment feeling a little sick to my stomach.  (Yes, this is too soon after what happened in Colorado and also in the Sikh temple recently, and I write this post to tell you all, this can’t possibly be right, right?)

[Again, I’m not against owning guns in a free country, but why so many and why so many semi-automatics and large magazine capacity guns?  Animals are usually running the other direction when you go after them and not attacking on average.]

So many couples with small kids and babies and strollers walking among the guns.  It seemed creepy to me.  Just another day out with the family on the weekend, buying semi-automatic rifles and sniper rifles and pistols with your son.

No joke, a dad had his son who might have been no more than eight, and he’s talking over how beautiful this gun was and they could have a lot of fun.  I guess…?

And then I realized what this is all about.  Of course!

THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE IS REAL! OMGOSH!

They had so many of these bullets.  They had a ton of them and they were zombie-killing caliber bullets.  For the zombie invasion!

No wonder all those people brought their kids.  They were preparing them for the zombie apocalypse, of course!

I really need to pay more attention to the news.  There was this entire world preparing for zombies, training up their kids in the way they should go with a Bible in one hand and a gun in the other.

By the time we made it to the end of the store I was ready to sit back, maybe have a cup of coffee, rest my mind, and they had a little restaurant that served elk and boar meat, but it was closed, so I looked over some comfy looking blankets and found a real pelt of a wolf and again it made me want to cry.  The wolf’s fur was beautiful and I am sure that wolf loved wearing it when he or she was alive.

My son held it and I saw his eyes water.  He’s very empathic.  And I realized… my gosh, this was once a beautiful wolf.

Yo

The fur was very similar to this guy’s fur.

I have always believed in freedom to bear arms, but this almost seemed ironic at this time and it really did sicken me down deep in my gut.  I don’t know why.  I’m not even sure it would have made me feel nauseous two years ago.  But recent events make me feel a bit sicker when I see so many guns and so many people buying them up.  It’s almost… surreal.

Yeah, killing animals for sport is not my idea of a sport, nor killing fellow humans.  Perhaps we should be teaching our children to appreciate life and respect others a bit more, take them on a nature hike or go out for an ice cream cone.

That would be nice, as long as it’s not at a Chick-fil-A (hahaha).

Now THIS is more my type of sporting event.

Umph – take that ball!

Yeahhhhhh, now this is a sport: all parties are equally involved and participating.  And no beautiful creatures were harmed here, at least not fatally.

The Amazing Spider-Man is…amazingly good

[WARNING:  POTENTIAL SPOILERS AHEAD]

I almost didn’t go to the movies last night.  It cost money and it was another Spider-man movie.  Sighhhh.  I didn’t have high hopes.  Being a person who has high standards when it comes to Marvel comics translating to the big screen, I wasn’t sure what to expect.   Peter Parker and Mary Jane are one of my all-time least favorite couples in the comic book world.  I love comics and despite not having the money to buy them any more, I still have a soft spot for the characters I grew to love:  Wolverine, X-Men, Avengers, New Avengers, X-23, X-Factor gang (so much awesomeness at the beginning), Tony Stark (Ironman), Captain America, Spider-woman (Jessica Drew), Thor, Sue Storm (MILF) and the rest of the FF4 (her hubs was kind of a douche, if you ask me, but her brother was cool), Rogue, Storm, and even Batman and Wonder Woman from DC.

My son, however, had heard from his sister that it was surprisingly good and so I wanted to go out with my son and have a good mom/son bonding night, and so we left for the movies.

Well, I have to admit I was impressed with this version.

I left the theater thinking I had seen a small budget Indie film simply because of the acting – all effortlessly done well.

Let’s start with the new guy, Andrew Garfield, raised in England so that he has a British accent (niiiiiice – I love British accents).  He didn’t, however, have a British accent in this movie.

Dashing, AND he has good hair – always a plus!

I like this jacket

He played Peter Parker in all his geeky and teenage angst, but not overblown angst that is so common with young male character parts played today where he’s either angry at the world and throwing tantrums or pouting in a corner and unable to function.  No, Andrew Garfield played him as a  normal young man with all the subtlety of someone who’s parents left him one night and later died in a car accident, and then being raised by a loving uncle and aunt.  He played it with such a subtle nuance of hurt and pain, but getting by because you have this spirit within you that really is a fighter and wants to do the right thing.

He is attracted to a cute and smart girl, Gwen Stacy, wonderfully played by Emma Stone, but not as a crazy stalker with nerves that undermine the entire relationship and makes you question, “Why the hell does she like this guy?”  No, once again, it’s a very normal admiration between two young people with similar interests and both with a good sense of right and wrong, mixed with humor and simple chemistry. Their relationship is possibly one of the better romances I’ve seen in a Marvel comic based movie.

She loves spandex and isn’t afraid to admit it

I did not even realize it was Emma Stone with blonde hair.  (She wears that color quite well, since she’s usually such a beautiful redhead.)  I thought, ‘Does Lindsey Lohan have a younger sister that can act?’  She looked like a young Lindsey Lohan when she was a very promising young actress who could actually act.  And then it hit me, “Oh my goodness, that’s Emma Stone!”  I don’t think I’ve seen her in one bad part.  Mostly, that is because Emma Stone brings out the best in every single actor she is partnered with and plays whatever role she has in a very real and normal “yeah-I-could-see-me-hanging-out-with-this-chick” type manner.  She is the best type of actress in that she merely translates a human being onto film and we all get the benefit of watching.

This was an especially cute knit hat

And so the couple was so much better than any Mary Jane and Peter Parker pairing.  The re-visualization of Peter Parker and Gwen Stacy was so cute and sweet and just a splendid couple to watch onscreen.  I look forward to the next  movie if these two are the characters once again and won’t feel I’m being forced into watching two people who have no chemistry but the script says they are meant to be together so believe because it says so and then not feel the love.

Yeah, I’m picky.  I’m especially picky on how they portray my comic-book characters that I grew to love.

[A side note:  The movie was directed by Marc Webb.  Does anyone else think that is kinda funny?  I laughed when the credits rolled at the end and asked my son if they were just kidding.  He said, “No.”]

…Okay.

Anyhoo, let’s move on.

Sally Field played Aunt May?!  Oh my goodness, SALLY FIELD WAS AUNT MAY!!!

She was one of my childhood crushes back when late 60s TV shows featured her in Gidget and The Flying Nun (see below).  She was the kid that never aged, despite hitting 40 and 50 and still looking like a 20-something-year-old.

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

And then I see her as Aunt May and of course, she was the perfect woman for the part now that she’s finally old enough to play an elderly woman, despite her still only looking in her 50s.  Martin Sheen also did well as Uncle Ben, but Aunt May goes on in the comics as Peter Parker’s always wise and sage old auntie that keeps his barometer on what is right and good.  All super heroes need an Aunt May in their life.

Uncle Ben, Aunt May, and a hungry Peter Parker

Oh yes, and the secondary parts and the villain must be mentioned.  They were necessary and didn’t do any harm to the plot.  It was a good villain, despite his looking similar to Godzilla in the movie poster here:

Sorry, I thought this was about a giant lizard roaming the streets of New York…

It was… kinda.

Rhys Ifans, born in Wales, played the villain, Dr. Curt Connor/The Lizard, well-meaning scientist who happens to inject himself with an experimental drug and then turns into a Japanese iconoclastic creature tearing up the streets of New York.  Sounds plausible to me, but yeah….

I recalled him from somewhere, and I realized he was the funny comic-relief pal in Notting Hill.

He was actually a very interesting super-villain and possibly my favorite scene was when he busted into his lab and took a cylinder from Gwen Stacy in a closet and looked her over, noted she was the young lady he mentored, took the canister and then let her be.  It was a good scene.   There was no damsel in distress because he went cuckoo and wanted to get Peter Parker – no, he remembered she was his intern, had some compassion left inside him somewhere and didn’t need anything other than the canister that happened to be in the closet with her.  It was a good, subtle and intelligent scene.

Ah fuck…that’s gonna leave a stain

His transformation was also something I thought was kind’a cool.

Anyhoo, secondary characters like Denis Leary as Captain Stacy, Gwen’s dad, and Chris Zylka as Flash, Parker’s school bully and nemesis, did good jobs.  I loved that Captain Stacy gets all badass at the end with a shotgun, no less.  That was an excellent touch.

I’m going to need a bigger gun

Okay, this just in, my son told me the serum that made Dr. Connor become a Lizard was the same serum OsCorp would later get their hands on to make Green Goblin and other crazy characters.  Basically, it not only transforms your body, but makes you a raving homicidal maniac with major psychosis, delusions, and megalomaniac tendencies.  That makes sense and makes for future super-villain stories later down the movie world path.  Neato.

Overall, it was a very good little movie that didn’t feel like a blockbuster.  Is it?  (Looks that up.)  Surprisingly, it’s done quite well at the box office,  being the third highest grossing film for 2012.  Not bad, since it was much better than the previous attempts to translate Spider-man into a movie.

My only complaint would be the music, and cliche child in peril scene.

The music left  much to be desired.  Stock theme music, really?  You couldn’t afford a good theme song?

Also, the little boy in the car who was saved (overdone irritating little boy that whines much too much).  It makes you feel guilty that you wouldn’t mind him falling to his death.

Oh yes, and at the end there was the usual ‘everyone cheers on Spider-man’ as he goes to save the day; but, I actually got all choked up when it happened and was cheering alongside the city of New York.  I enjoyed this Spider-man so much more than the last one.

And so ends my review on Spider-man for the worldwide web (*wink*).  I’d give it 4 1/2 stars out of five.

Another Random Post: Hannah Hart, Dog pee, and Living on the Streets is fun!

Every so often I simply start typing for a random post.  It was merely two months ago my heart was left in another country.  (I’m waiting for it’s visa to be approved and returned to me.)

I’m not crying…yet.

I drew a picture of my recent mood, and so that’s why I’m trying to be upbeat in this post (it will happen after this pic).

the extent of my artistic ability – circles!

(Photo of my head and yes, my head isn’t as round in my thought bubbles.  I also have no hair – what’s with that?)

And please, don’t “Awwwww Vaaaaallllll… why so sad?”  😦  It’s cool – my moods swing a lot like someone who is bi-polar – BUT NOT…?  So weird, right?

And so I am randomly posting a post of randomness.  (And sorry for the serious tone at the beginning of this post, I will now maintain a happier tone throughout this post.)

I had to practice drawing my circles to get them this round! 😀

I mix serious with comedic often.  I think that has to do with me being a child of the 70s and growing up with sardonic humor, classic Saturday Night Live, George Carlin and The Mac Davis Show (it was a comedy/variety hour on NBC).

Don’t judge – Barbara Streisand had this same hair style

(OhEmGee, I just realized I owned this album… squeeeee, I was such a Mac Davis fan!)

Where was I… and what was with that hair in the 70s?  Everyone had this style (possibly I might have had this hair style…heh…heh…heh………..heh…heh).

Oh yes, back to being random:

I simply let my mind go… random, like releasing my dog at 7:30 in the morning (much too early to be woken by my dog) out the front door of my apartment and slurring so that my words run all together, sounding hung over (which many times I am) and waving, “Go – doyoshit-anI’ll leyuuu back in… inafew…. bubye.”

I’m pretty sure that’s poor apartment etiquette.

Thank goodness no one has complained, but then I don’t answer my door that early any way.

I’ve considered tying his leash to my other dog’s leash, who always returns to the apartment because everything, even crickets, frighten her and she quickly runs back home.  She could be my dog walker and I wouldn’t have to pay her anything but a few extra dog biscuits.

(Oh wow, I am seriously trying that tomorrow morning!)

First, the hair…

Random posts usually mean I must share a pic of good hair days.

This is my angelic pic I took when I pushed some button accidentally on my phone while taking the pic because I tend to do dumb and clumsy things like pushing the wrong button (don’t ever give me a job with nuclear reactors or in missile silos) because my hair is very long now (to me, not my sister who told me it’s not very long, but I dispute that) and I’m considering cutting it into a boy-ish-les style since I love short hair and I want to get this choppier look and bleach underneath.

Seeeeeee?  *whiny voice* it’s sooooooo loooooonnnnnngggggg!

I look like a ghostly apparition

Though… I was having a totally awesome hair day! *big grin*

Right?

Funny Women…woman…?

If you haven’t seen “My Drunk Kitchen” with star Hannah Hart, on YouTube, you need your gay license revoked.  (Quick, look it up on YouTube!)   That’s like asking, “Who are Ellen and Portia?”  …just sayin….

(By the way, if only Hannah Hart was 20 years older I’d totally be in love with her; at the moment I am simply in awe of her talent.)

She’s adorable

Abs are a… talent… right?

o.o

I totally posted that pic for my best friend.  Happy Birthday! ^__^

This is a good hair length… and goes well with plaid

She is so funny… and a lesbian (or as I like to call us, Sapphians, because I hate that L word – which I will have some commentary on this subject later in this post – something to look forward to *winkwink*).

There is nothing sexier than a funny woman.  I’m just not sure I am funny enough to cross the plateau of sexiness, but I’m working on it – the sexiness not the funniness…okay, I might need a lot of work.

Texas is hot…

Yeah… it really is.

No, I mean it is really fuckin hot…!

Yeahhhhhh… it really is!

I hate this weather so much.

Why?  WHHHHYYYYYYYYY???  Why do I live here and not on a beach somewhere?!  …with a breeze? …and cold drinks (alcoholic drinks)?

The prediction is over 100 degree days for at least the next 10 days.  It’s supposed to hit 106 Fahrenheit (that’s 41 Celsius for everyone who ‘doesn’t’ live in the U.S.) on “SUN”day, giving a whole new meaning to the name.

Dog Peeeeeeeeeed… on my bed

Little piece of $#%%#!!!@###@

(I truly suck at figuring out which upper case cuss symbols to use.)

So, I drew a pic of my (adopted) dog who knew what she did.

See? Whoville paws!

Oozing of guilt

I share this rare and raw drawing talent with only you folks.

I was so p***d off at her.  She knew what she did as guilt carried her little Whoville paws across the apartment.  She went running to my roommate’s door, scratching and crying to be let in.  I swear in doggy talk she was crying, “Sanctuary… sanctuary… sanccccctuuuuuary….” like in that Disney cartoon based loosely on The Hunchback of Notre Dame.  (I loved the portrayal of Frollo – a truly evil character – in that movie.)

boo

Brrrr…. scary dude!

I didn’t get that evil on the pup and today I later laughed about it.

I had to sleep quite uncomfortably on my bed with a blanket and no sheets, but at least I didn’t get locked out of the house like my poor friend who I think is sleeping in a park with a few hookers, homeless people and turtles, and maybe an alligator – not sure.  (It’s cool, I’m sure she’ll be let back in her house eventually….)

Speaking of living on the streets….  Were we?

Can you believe they actually have a runaway guide?  How does the runaway get internet connection and a computer?  The dude maintains a blog?!  You have to love people’s resourcefulness, right?

They have “How to” guides on living on the street.  Wow, just to list a few things to remember, folks:

1. Pack lightly and don’t forget your sleeping pad (you might need that added padding while on concrete).

2. Be sure and stick around homeless people so that you blend in inconspicuously.  (You have a better chance of not being arrested.)

3. Sleep in the park during the day so you don’t get busted by the cops and draw unnecessary attention.  (Really?  A person sleeping on a bench with a duffle bag and sleeping bag doesn’t draw attention?)

4. If you can’t find homeless people, simply find a well-lit pedestrian walkway (people will walk ‘around’ your limp body that’s snoozing).

5. Rooftops work well for sleeping (just don’t sleep near the edge).

6. This is my fave:  Look for free samples in grocery stores.  (And I found that if you go to liquor stores on the weekend they are dishing out free alcohol! Win-win!)

7. Extra bonus tips:

– wide brim hats for the sun (you wouldn’t want skin cancer later in life)

– lightweight jogging/warm-up suits (they pack well and you can wear them while laundering)

– strap your belongings to your person so nobody walks off with yo shit

– try to smell nice so you can still maintain a healthy personal life (wtf? O.o)

– and last, but not least, try to obtain a gym membership so you can use their showers… and stay fit

Wow, it makes living on the street sound like luxury housing.  As I add up my bills I’m considering living on the street.  The Runaway Blogger tells me that he lives like a king using whatever income he has on nice restaurants and bars.  Nomadic life sounds… intriguing!

Last, but not least, a word about “the L word…”

I’m just sayin, this word bugs the heck out of me.  I don’t know why, but lesbian sounds so… negative…?  It makes me sound like a dyke when I am obviously not a very good dyke.  I’m not trying to cut down dykes – they’re a’ight – but I am gay and not a butch type and so if I call myself a lesbian it sounds so… rough…?

(Wow, and why am I ending all my sentences with a questionable question mark…?)

I prefer a more feminine approach to my sexual orientation like “female homosexual,” “female homo” or “gay woman,” (in contrast to dour woman, of course), or even my new word that I think should be instantly adopted as the word of choice, “Sapphian.”  I like the smoothness of the sound when you say “Sapphian” as opposed to “Lesbian.”

You tell me.  Should we choose to be called, “Sapphian’s” rather than “Lesbians?”

Please vote once I figure out how to post a poll and let me know.  In the meantime, please answer in the comment section (haha, I just typed sexion by mistake) if you prefer Sapphian or Lesbian, or your own choice.  Maybe you prefer the word “human.”  I’m good with that too. 😉

Be blessed, mi friendos, and stay cool… like Corey Hart in the 80s!

You can not beat the sheer corniness of 80s music videos…eh?

…And why are they always randomly running down hallways in those vids?  So random… *wink*

Nightmares… and DOMA Dreams…

I slept in this morning and had a nightmare, but then I dreamed a dream about DOMA….

Yesterday morning I had a weird dream of my greatest fear:  being mauled alive by a big cat, like a tiger, lion, cougar – or some other big cat – and screaming bloody hell in terror.  (That, and that chimpanzees or apes rip me apart and eat my face and hands, but this dream only had big cats, heh.)  I don’t know why I have this fear.  It’s just a creepy and weird fear, but I will have a nightmare at least once a month of this occurring.

Because of these fears I have a phobia of going to zoos or any animal parks.  Even if the windows are closed all the way, I have a fear of being in those large animal parks.  It would make one wonder why I went to the ‘continent capital of the world’ with large, dangerous and predatorial animals like Africa.  Well… good question.

(Ponders momentarily if there is some hidden metaphor – but, I got nothing.)

And then I woke from that nightmare and fell back to sleep and slept in this morning until… well, let’s not say, but it was very late.  I don’t have work today and I guess I was tired, but again I wanted to go work out at the gym or at least get in a good two hour walk.  But, now I have to clean the apartment and move stuff out of a storage unit and go to the dump and do all kinds of things because I’m moving to a new place next weekend and need to take advantage of this free time to move and clean.

However (again, never start a sentence with this word, but I’m blogging and so I take all type of grammatical license), I then fell back to sleep (since I’m tired) and dreamed a wildly wonderful dream of me giving a speech to lawmakers, congress or the Senate, not sure, about why they should abolish the DOMA law.

In the dream there was this feeling of such love for my partner.  She looked like Di, and might have even been Di, but I wasn’t sure who it was because in dream land she wasn’t really revealed, and I couldn’t see her really, but she was beautiful and loved me and it was a wild dream, and this time I woke up quite happy and content.

Now, I’m not claiming prophetic visions here, I think I just wrapped around this timely argument with a beautiful picture, which is that I would want my beautiful wife standing with me if I ever made an impassioned speech against a bigoted law in front of lawmakers in our country.  Wouldn’t you? *big cheesy grin*

 

Anyhoo, the speech…

 

It started with me speaking on one male and one female as the only recognized marital union in our country, and thus was born the Defense of Marriage Act, known as DOMA.  But, I told them, this is a lie since we happen to know there are couples in our country that are same gender – male/male and female/female.  And so, already despite this law being on the books, because our American citizens are married as same gender, then we would have to nullify the existence that these American citizens are living lives we as a country recognize.

And so, does this mean that we do not recognize these American citizens?  What does that mean of their existence as a citizen in this country if their partner in life and their familial unit is not recognized?  Are they criminals of the country?  Should they all be locked up… in little closets?  Should they pay taxes?  Are they like illegal immigrants?  Should they be shipped off to some gay country?  (That was a trick question, there are no solely gay countries that I know of… are there?  *winkwink*)  What is their status since they are not recognized as true American citizens according to DOMA?  If a gay person falls in a forest and a straight person is the only one standing nearby who heard them fall… did they really fall?!  (Aha, another trick question.)

(In the dream I was wagging my finger and felt like I was doing a bit part in a Monty Python skit.)

And then I said, well then perhaps we should look at this from a Biblical perspective, since we say our country is founded on Biblical principal and the reason why we have our laws in the first place is because of the Ten Commandments…

See – right here! Right here on the dotted line! By the way… do you read Hebrew?

No, Charlton, these 10 Commandments

…very interesting

These are summed up by Christ in two greatest commandments.

The first:  “Love the Lord our God with all our heart and soul and mind and strength.”  We recognize this on our monetary funds, “In God we Trust” and it’s written in our constitution and it’s written in our pledge of allegiance, and so we have taken that to mean something in our country – putting God first.

And if we look at the second commandment our criminal laws are basically summed up by this: “love one another as you love yourself.”  And thus murder, rape, stealing, suicide, and all crimes on the books of criminal law have to do with harming our fellow citizen or our self.  Correct?  And so, because of these two great commandments we have formed what we consider by many, a Biblical standard and thus are called a Judeo-Christian country.

Can we all agree on that?

And so then, let’s look at the DOMA law from a Biblical perspective since that is why we even formed it in the first place.  It certainly wasn’t from the standpoint of freedom to all and equality for all, or we would have allowed the homosexually oriented citizens of our country equal rights and not allowed a law that is biased against them.

But I digress, of course, because when do I ever write a post where I don’t digress at least once?  *ba-dum*

You always digress Val…

Thank  you, Kristen Bell (my best buds crush – placed just for her). *cheesy grin*

As I was saying, I have heard time and again, Genesis 2:24, gives us a male and female as the standard of perfect union and that’s how it should always be because of one verse in Scripture.  We have based an entire system on one single verse and only one couple that are supposedly the most perfect couple… I mean, if you don’t place the fact they caused the fall of all mankind, took advice from a snake, and happened to have a son who murdered his brother (gotta wonder about the upbringing and all) and I’m sure they were perfect despite all that.

Scary, isn’t it?

What happens when they pull out a law based on the single verse that states we should stone people, or own slaves, or put women in their place?  I know I should probably start placing wildly ridiculous verses here if we forget context and culture and time period, and just pull them out and let them stand alone they would make no sense.  But I am hoping people who are reading this are smart enough to figure out how ludicrous this is to base an entire law on one verse, or one example.

And so, Adam and Eve as the perfect union of marriage because they happen to be male and female and were first (woo, first in line folks!) make so much sense.  Right?  It’s Biblical, kinda, but not all American citizens in a free country – a country that promotes the freedom to believe – believe in the Bible.  Some believe in other works like the Koran or the book of Mormon, or something or other, and some are atheist.  We allow that in a free country.  It’s their God-given right, actually. *wink*

We are a nation of equality and freedom, above all else.

Can we all agree on that?

Now, man and woman are created in God’s image, from a Biblical viewpoint of course, and that is in Genesis 1:27.  (Equally, by the way, man and woman are equally made in His image.  No gender is more important to God, despite many thinking men are superior to women or vice versa – they are equal.)

Can we all agree to that?

But we have a law, DOMA, based on a perfect marriage example and so that is what we based this law upon in our Judeo-Christian country.  It is called the defense of marriage act because they are defending marriage and all the things that are out there to destroy it – no wait, DOMA believes ONLY all the gay people out there want to destroy families and marriage.

…

As I was saying, I have even heard ludicrous comments like the human race will no longer exist because everyone will become gay and no more babies will be born.  My thoughts are that as long as there are males and females around there will never be a shortage of babies being born, unless there really is a zombie epidemic that will be unleashed on humanity in the next 20 or so years.  I don’t think zombies have babies, but don’t quote me on this.

Isn’t she adorbs?  The baby, not the author.

I know for a fact you can’t make straight people gay any more than you can make gay people straight.  I mean… it just doesn’t work.  If you are straight you know this and if you are gay you know this.  So maybe the worry is with those who are in hiding and don’t want to admit they are gay or straight?

Awww… this zombie baby is so cute

(Sorry, I just had to add another zombie baby.)

I’m pretty sure the over 50% divorce rate couldn’t possibly be a signal marriage is getting ruined by male and female relationships.  Right?  I’m sure the under 10% of homosexual citizenship, and not even all of that percentage actually want to marry, are to blame for the disintegration of the American family.  What is the “American family” anyway?

Will we blame the disintegration of marriage on homosexuality since it’s easier to blame the minority than realize maybe the fabric of marriage doesn’t need to be protected from gay people as much as it needs to be protected from straight people who are lost, and deadbeat dads, and selfish moms, and lack of parental love, and love in general, and all those things that are ruining familial units that are taking precedence to gay couples that really haven’t been adding to the whole destruction of families for the last 40 or 50-plus years now.

And why are we even looking to the government to encroach on our civil liberties and fix marriage?  Maybe we need to start looking at ourselves?

Maybe we are blaming the wrong people and heterosexual marriage doesn’t really need to be protected from homosexual marriage as much as we think it does, and maybe we are simply looking for a minority group to blame for our majority rule problem.

Can we all agree to that?

 

However, we seem to want to promote a Biblical point of view on marriage, so then let’s get Biblical…

 

David, the man after God’s own heart, had a partner named Jonathon (I Samuel 20:41,42) and some will argue they were simply good buddies, but they were quite affectionate for being simply buds (they kissed a lot).  In fact, David loved Jonathon more than any of his offspring producing women that he had to marry (2 Samuel 1:26).  But then, I think David was just a loving guy.  Case in point:  marrying Abigail because she was desperate and had been married to an abusive guy.  David was a really sweet guy and took her in and in Scripture you see it was no great love story, but a story of a guy being nice to a widow (I Samuel 25:39-43).  There was no affection and it was a proposal sent by messenger and by they way, he also grabbed another wife along the way named Ahinoam from Jezreel.  Odd how the only person David seemed intent on hugging and kissing and being affectionate with was Jonathon.

Well, now we’re getting into taboo territory and so what if we scrap David as a man who could love both men and women, and was truly in love with a guy, and was basically and possibly pansexual, bisexual or omnisexual, but then… what happens to that stalwart guy who was super artsy, danced in the streets, and kinda acted like a really effeminate and pretty dude, who’d break into song and dance, and liked to lift his hands randomly and if you think about it, isn’t very much like all those macho dudes who I see at church who don’t like to sing.

But then, David was also one heck of a fighter and warrior.  He was simply a very Renaissance type man before the Renaissance period.  (He was probs super cool to be friends with too.)

Well, maybe this super awesome artsy musician/warrior/tender-hearted man, David with such a caring and wonderful heart actually fell in love with the soul of someone and not the gender.  He just fell in love with Jonathon, and Jonathon was in love with him, and that’s that.  He loved who he loved, much like God.

Is this heresy?  I just think you should read the stories of David and see for yourself.

Well, if you are male is God married to you?  Does He love you as much as any female follower?  Of course He does.  God is God and He loves and loves and loves.  There is no gender favoritism with God.

Okay, so now we have David, a man after God’s own heart and maybe he just loved who he loved.  I would think since this has to do with marriage we should start with the heart, and so…

Let’s contrast David the man after God’s heart, with Adam a man in God’s image and possibly the first man.  Which one is the example of a perfect husband?  Should we use David?

OMGosh…And what of Paul?  (I’m digressing again.)  He was never married.  Does that make being single the perfect way to live?  (Wasn’t Paul paying attention to Adam and  Eve and their perfect union PERFECTION?!?!?!  I thought he was a Bible scholar…sorry, got carried away.  And, I am writing on Paul’s thorn in the flesh next time.  Psst, it wasn’t homosexuality – he had much bigger problems as you will find out later.)

Anyhoo, Paul said being single is preferable to marriage.  Is marriage simply a secondary choice and not the best choice?  Why did God create a man and woman if the two aren’t really all that preferable?  Why aren’t we having a defense of remaining single act?

OR… why don’t we have a defense of marrying as many as you can afford act (David was quite wealthy – being a king and all)?  Why can’t rich people have more wives?  It seems only fair for all those poor women out there joining eHarmony and other sites looking for a man, and for even those men out there – let’s be fair – who need a woman?  There are rich women too.  The rich marriage act?

Pssh… I’m worth Six Million Dollars!

Aren’t we all humans and basically as Adam’s offspring (mankind) made in God’s image?  But then, Adam caused us all to be in sin and David was known as a murderer, and so maybe we should really be following Abraham’s’ example.

Aha, Abraham, of course!  He was only married to one woman, Sarah (a relative, by the way), and God sent His covenant of faith through Abraham.  (And, let’s not worry about all his concubines and children from all those other women he slept with while married to his one wife.  We’ll just sweep that under a rug.)

But no, it’s stated that Jesus was born through the line of David, and so he seems like the best example of manhood, if you ask me.  But then, which patriarchal line matters for Jesus? …for us?

Well, it doesn’t matter, because from a Biblical perspective we have many views of having a partner if we look to Biblical examples honestly.  But… psst, we’re not really supposed to be placing the Bible on our government laws since there is supposed to be separation of church and state.

We are running a country and not a church.  And thank goodness because I would not want our country’s bureaucrats running my church, any more than most would want this church or that church running our country.  Who would pick which denomination would run it?

Sigh, can we all agree to that?

Oh Val… I am trying so hard to be the gay president. Don’t place me with those guys.

Hah, I love when he makes that face.

 

So, Let’s Get Back to Reality…

 

We live in a country of many types of citizens.  Our laws are to be for the American people, not only the Judeo-Christian people, but all our citizens as best as possible.

Civil laws protect our basic human rights as free and equal citizens, and criminal laws protect our physical lives so that no undue stress or harm comes to the citizens of our country.

In actuality, we don’t really know why DOMA is on the books because now we have to figure out about what is really right for our American citizens.

A same gender couple is not going against any criminal law of harming another, nor is a same gender couple hurting the civil liberties of any heterosexual couple.  They just are not hurting our country in any definable or reasonable manner. 

They are not truly going against any Biblical law, or David and any Biblical patriarch for that matter, should be ignored in all future Bible studies and basically that part of the Bible should really be thrown out because these men are living in a criminal act against any one man/one woman marriage that they tout is how all marriage should be recognized because of the Adam and Eve example pointed out in Genesis 2:24.  Since the Bible supposedly holds the ONLY viable answer to how marriage works (yet, it has many marriage and non-marriage examples).  Why are we even allowing our God-fearing American citizens access to reading about these polygamists, pansexuals, bisexuals, omnisexuals, and asexuals?  Whatever are we teaching our children in Sunday School?  …In Bible Study?  Gahh, it could get quite tricky.

Indeed, my Fellow Americans…indeed

And so, maybe the Bible’s supposed example of one man and one woman marriage is really a moot subject when it comes to equal rights of American citizens.

DOMA is a law that states marriage is the union of only one man and one woman.

That is the law of our country.

And so, homosexual Americans are not equal citizens in our country.  They are only attracted to the same sex, so any union they have will NEVER be recognized as legal in this country.  They just are not equal according to our laws.

Hate crime laws should be abolished, because they state harming a person for their sexual orientation is an offense.  In our country since they are lesser citizens without equal rights, that law should be taken off the books.  Any laws of discrimination – removed.

You see, because of DOMA’s reasoning homosexual Americans are no longer equal citizens and don’t deserve any type of rights that states they have been harmed by bias since they do not have the same civil rights of heterosexual Americans.  Their own country is biased against them, and so that makes it all right.

No, of course I am being hyper-ludicrous!  Sigh…

They are a minority who we have seen do suffer from hate crimes and from unfair practices in the work place, and so for us to on one hand protect homosexual citizens in our criminal law, but not address them as equal citizens in the civil law and protect their civil liberties of freedom we are simply being hypocrites and basically being bigots.

An American citizen has every right to live, love, and exist in a free country as they deem fit for their own person.  If they are not harming another or hurting themselves then they have that freedom to exist and live like every other American citizen.

It’s time they enjoy equal rights like every other American citizen and are allowed to marry the only other gender they are attracted to, because they certainly don’t want to marry the opposite sex.

If you are straight, would you want to marry the same sex?

…Of course not.

Let’s simply be sensible and act like Americans who promote freedom for all.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if for the Fourth of July we can finally be a country of freedom for all, and equality for all our citizens, and not have one group of our citizens treated unfairly and unequally?

DOMA is a blight on our civil liberties and needs to go once and for all.  It doesn’t defend anyone; it only unfairly attacks homosexual American citizens.

Gay Americans are simply not going to go away so we’re going to have to figure out how to all get along freely, equally, and with simple respect.  It’s merely the right thing to do.

And then I turned to the love of  my life and in the dream, since it was a dream, she smiled and I knew I was loved by her, despite my digressions and all. *wink*  But then I woke up… and DOMA was still a law and so… it’s certainly something to ponder and think about.  And maybe that’s all dreams do, they wake us up to new or better thoughts for tomorrow.

A Good Read with a Good Word…

Woo, comfiest pants ever!

I’m happy because I just ordered three books online:  Beth Moore’s, Get out of That Pit (on a whim because I have always loved Beth Moore’s insight into her very personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and I’m in a pit at the moment) [EDIT:  It wasn’t a very good book and I wouldn’t suggest buying it.]; Brennan Manning’s, Ragamuffin Gospel (I bought this as a birthday present for someone and read it about half way, and realized I needed to finish the book – it’s that good) [EDIT:  FANTASTIC BOOK – a must read]; and Larry Crabb’s, Shattered Dreams (a suggestion from a friend – I hope its not depressing) [EDIT: I still haven’t read this one.].

Something happened to me while I went for my “prayer walk.”

This is something I have done for years now, “prayer walks.”  I used to have a swimming pool in my old house and would go for “prayer swims.”  I have also gone on “prayer drives.”  You are probably wondering, about now, ‘What are you talking about?’

Well, I shall tell you:

Basically, while you are alone you just talk to God.  You talk to Him as your Abba Father and Lord who loves you.  You talk to Him like you would to any friend, but more like a friend who watches over you and cares for you, and you trust actually listens and never lets you down.  The most reliable friend you will ever have.  He is your loving father and the lover of your soul and you approach Him with complete honesty and trusting that He loves you enough to speak to you.  It’s something I think all believers benefit from, just talking to God.

I actually learned about it early on from Beth Moore.  It was during one of the myriad studies I’ve read from here and I cannot recall which one (since I’ve done around 11+ studies), but I do realize this one stuck with me.  (I wonder if it was the study on the Fruits of the Spirit?  Hmm…. I should just go through the books and get back with you all.  It wouldn’t hurt, right?)

Anyhoo, it is more casual than the usual prayer time that most people have when they sit alone and read a Scripture and then have their allotted “quiet time.”  Mind you, I am not against quiet times, per se, because people are all very different.  You have your “A” type personality and your “B” type personality, and any combination of personality.  We all handle our life situations in the best possible manner and so some people actually have to exist with a set hour and time to have quiet time.  But, it is not the only way.  For those of us who are more night owls, or the type who are more spontaneous (which is not a bad thing) and fly by the seat of our pants we tend to just need to get away and talk to God at a random moment.  THESE times are when you have a prayer walk, or drive, or swim.  You simply know you have to get away and talk to God and it can happen any time and anywhere.

It’s random, I guess, is what I am saying.

It’s like knowing you have the kind of best friend that is merely a phone call away and you can bother any hour of the night and they will not turn you away.  God becomes your closest confidante through a process of life lived with Him becoming your best friend.  You have grown this great of a relationship with your God and this is what every believer should attain eventually.

And so…

God has spoken to me the most through these times.  He’s led me to make better decisions through these times.  I listen to Him more, during these times.  I write better blog posts through these times.  And Scripture is usually brought more clearly to memory at these times. 

It’s a time for clarity.

Let me give you a bit of an example of how you need to speak to Him through these times just to help you all along:

(Insert what you call your Lord when you speak to Him here.)  I call Him, My Heavenly Father, my Lord (and then I usually sigh with the weight of my problem)?

Thank you for this beautiful (insert any word here) day, that You have made.  Please, O’ Spirit, fill me so that I will be a blessing to others today, and that I would hear You.  And that I would be blessed by others.  Mostly, that I not forget You through my day and You are always brought back to my thoughts.

And then I usually just start talking and it goes on…. 

The prayer is all about Him.  It’s thanking Him.  It’s telling Him I know He loves me and I accept His will because He has my best interest in store.

I will many times pray for my closest friends and family, and whatever comes to mind, but mostly this time is for me to talk to God about “me” and to acknowledge Him in my life. I ask for His will, not mine, to be done.  And I even share that I am scared to face His will because it might mean I lose someone that I think is best for me, but He knows might not be the best person for me.  I fear the outcome, but I am even honest with that fear.  I am merely ‘honest’ with Him about it all.

It’s a time when I find out how “I” can make a difference in other’s lives.  How “I” can be a blessing to others.  How “I” can point others to Him and glorify Him in my day and walk, and in any endeavor.

It’s a prayer to build in me the servant and warrior He can use.  How can “I” be useful for the Kingdom of God?

Seek ye first the kingdom of God, actually means something.

Search, and you will find Him… means something.

We are to always be searching and seeking and knowing and trusting that He will guide us through our days.

Really.  We are to always be searching and seeking and learning to know who God is.  Who He is to you, my friends, makes all the difference when life gets hard….

You need to find this out in life, or you will keep muddling through insecure in your God and in your salvation.

You need to know God in your life or what are you falling back on when troubles come up and hardships seemingly overwhelm you that you don’t want to get out of bed, or work another hour at that mundane job, or have to do the same housework or change the same diaper.  You get overwhelmed with sameness, or you get overwhelmed with change.  You just get overwhelmed with every day and you wonder how you will make it to tomorrow.

Especially, if you have a broken heart, or a broken family, or a broken life… or just, breaking over heartache that you wonder if it will ever stop?

My reasoning behind all this…

Well…sigh, I ordered those books because I had a bad day yesterday.  I would randomly just start crying because my heart hurts right now.  I wanted to be happy-go-lucky Val again.  I wondered if I would ever be that person again.

See, this is my happy-go-lucky look, as I shared at the beginning of this post.

Woo, still the comfiest pants ever!

So, I went for a walk.  I packed up the little doggie who is staying at my place, told her we’re heading out (to which she went a bit bonkers cause she loves… w-a-l-k-s) and left for a walk.  During said walk I began to talk. (Rhyme score! Yes!) And, He spoke to me.

He told me, “its okay.  I’m here for you.  I love you.”

I can actually feel His loving arms wrap around my heart.  Am I just assuming this?  Am I forcing a feeling?

I will tell you this:  I know for a fact He holds me in His loving arms because He told me He does in His Word and I have read enough to know He does not lie.

Right now, I am going through a healing process – process being the operative word.  I know I have to go through it.  Time has to take place.  It’s part of the cost because sin entered the world.

Do you all realize that?  Time actually is a human function after sin.  There was no time when eternity was all that existed before sin entered.

Think about it.

(There was once no need for a  Time Lord like Dr. Who.  Just saying….  And I know I am a nerd.  A nerd who loves Dr. Who.  Heh)

Even all of language speaks the truth of God in the fact all language has the “to be” verb that starts every learning of a new language.  You learn, “I am; You are,” and so on as you learn your “to be” verbs in language.

Do you realize how very logical and ordered God is with everything?

When Jesus Christ spoke as they were ready to take Him away to be hung on a cross all He said was His name, “I. AM.” The ground shook and the soldiers fell backward and could not stand – not one.  It is because He is the ultimate “being” the ultimate beginning of all language, the ultimate “to be” verb.  He is actively, “I Am.”  There is no other beginning to anything without Him.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was in the beginning with God. All things came into being by Him, and apart from Him nothing came into being that has come into being.”  John 1:1-3

(Okay, that whole “to be” section was for a future post, but I’m leaving it because I like that verse so much.  And where were we?  Time?)

So now… we have ‘time’ to always contend with.  It affects these aging bodies and it affects these memories of pain and hurt.  Time is both our enemy and our friend.  It’s part of this mortal life.

I know for a fact I will live through this and go on and be better through this and because of this, but it doesn’t mean it will abruptly just stop hurting.

I will feel the full weight of hurt and pain.

Christ, when He hung on the cross, felt the full weight of hurt and pain and much more than this.  He did all this for me and for you, so it never lessens His understanding that you are hurting.  He knows when we are in pain.  I remind myself often of what Christ went through so that I can stop feeling sorry for myself.

By the way, that is so easy to do.  It’s so easy to get stuck in the mire of self pity.  It starts to feel good because it means you don’t have to think any more.  It means you can sit in the same spot and not feel and possibly just die inside.

But that isn’t how you can be a blessing to others and it certainly isn’t how you can be blessed, or have any future service in life.  We are meant to be lights in this dark world.  We are made to be a difference.

Yes, you can take little outings to the mire of self-pity (it’s a nice little spot just outside the Florida Everglades, heh) – that is very understandable and necessary – but, you just can’t stay there.  You have to move on and that is when time is your friend.  It helps you heal through the process of the passing of time.

Which reminds me about my prayer walk, I stopped at the middle of the road, the doggie I was walking yanking on the leash telling me, “That’s all well and good, master mom, but I seriously have small legs and don’t want to walk any more.”

I told her, “I’m talking here.  Relax, pup, we’re on our way home.”

She looked up at me with her little brown puppy eyes and then as if she knew I was talking to God, she actually just calmed down.

Smart pup.

[Side note:  Do you ever wonder if dogs and animals talk to God all the time?  I mean if even the rocks sing His praises you’d think an animal would be able to converse with God randomly.  Just wondering….]

“hoc est dolor canis”

I’m actually very attached to the little pup.  She’s grown on me, and so I take her for walks with me.  She belongs to my daughter’s boyfriend, and I’m thinking of just keeping her.

Anyhoo, I had some other stuff I was going to share, like the fact my hair was having a good day.

Retro swish – Hellooo 80s!

And the fact, my ego never ceases to amaze me.

um…yeahhhhh

And, the fact I am slightly sad the ex-love-of-my-life might not be reading my blog any more because when it comes down to it, I need readers and followers of my blog because it kinda strokes my overinflated ego at any given moment.

Heh…

Heh…

Plus, to know you are simply a forgettable person, unlike being unforgettable, but forgettable…it hurts too?

Hurts…a lot. (And, I love Nat King Cole!  Don’t you?)

(Please listen as you read the next part – it heightens the emotion… and it makes it funnier.  I need a laugh.  Plus, I placed the karaoke version for later. *winkwink*  Interactive!)

But yeah, who wants to be forgotten?  …A blip on the radar of another’s life?  I think that hurts the most, especially for egoistic types like me who are hair obsessive and longs for stroking of said ego:  to know I will simply be forgotten.

Like, I didn’t mean that much to another person, despite me not being able to go through my day having something and everything remind me of her.  I still wear the engagement bracelet she gave me – mostly cause it’s colorful and from South Africa and so it’s so cool and I get compliments on it like from the Starbucks guy who said, “Awesome bracelet, man.”  Yeah, heh, it was given to me by…

I love my bracelet, and I have a very nice looking hand. 🙂

… and I start choking and almost crying… but I wear it cause I still like it.  Does that make me an awful person?  Someone who can’t move on?  Oh my gosh, I am pathetic!!! *cries*

*…cries some more*

Okay, I need to stop.

…And this is her wrist and hand…and…its nice too.

*cries some more*

(Right now I’d love to insert a dancing cat wearing a hat (Rhyme!) or some other silly gif)

*sniffs it up*

(Okay, just typing that out made me stop crying.  Totes killed the self-pity mood.)

I have to stop because I felt my foot slip a little and I was going to that mire again, but I don’t want to fall in that mud and crud.  (Rhyme win!  High five!)

I want to climb out and… it’s just going to be awhile.  This will take time.

Please be patient with me.  I have a broken heart.  I hope if I can help another of you out there with a broken heart, head, anything broken – arm? – maybe I can be a blessing to you as I share my heartache, then I will be happy.  Eventually, I will be happy-go-lucky-Val again because I have something of value:  Jesus Christ is truly the lover of my soul and He will never let me go as I prayer walk through this life.

I do truly trust in that fact, despite my ‘at times’ sounding a little depressing… or pathetic and listening to beautiful standards of the early 60s, alone in my room, with the lights turned down and trying hard to type since I have weak and aged eyes.

Bear with me, kay? ^^;;;

I hope you all have a good day.  I plan on it because it started out on a good note – talking to the One who has me wrapped in His loving arms of grace and love. ^__^

I will be all right… eventually.

And is that song still playing?  Oh wow, you all really need to sing along.   Karaoke Friday!

Ah well, I did Watch the Academy Awards…

March rings in a new month and also a new blog post.

I’ve  no idea what to write.  I asked my friend, Bern, a.k.a. Nemesis Bern, what to write.  She was full of so many ideas (NOT) and so I decided to go with the Academy Awards show.  I actually watched the whole thing.  I don’t usually do that, but I like James Franco and Anne Hathaway, and despite not being the hip and young demographic they were aiming for, I thought I’d give it a watch.

So, I sat down with my computer and a drink and watched the show.

It began promising enough, as the two young hosts were Inceptionized.  (Inception did have awesome effects.) The fact they were in Alec Baldwin’s dream, but not really in his dream, but also in his dream, but not… and that it was narrated by Morgan Freeman (my first choice if my dream was being narrated) was funny.  Maybe I have low expectations, but I enjoyed that part.

Now, the rest of the show I can only say, “Worst Academy Awards show EVER.”  It was, and this is my take on the show.

The music was horrible.  I usually love the music section and the original scores, but even that was boring.  Randy Newman won.  Seriously?  Hans Zimmer lost?  Seriously?  Oh man, there were so many unoriginal songs.  Where did the classics go?  The songs that indelibly stuck in your memory for years to come?  Only the section where they auto-tuned the actors speaking in the movie scenes was good.

Hah, James Franco is sooooo stoned; but that only lasted the first few times you saw him stoned and then it got old.  It seemed Anne Hathaway was carrying the show to make up for his sudden disappearances.  She was adorable and cute as ever.  Doesn’t she seem like the coolest best friend to  have?  …next to Flo from the Progressive commercials?

And was it me, or did half the women wear red?  Sandra Bullock, Anne Hathaway, Jennifer Hudson, Jennifer Lawrence… okay maybe only four that I actually noticed.

I loved Mila Kunis’ lavendar Grecian dress.  It was my fave of the evening next to the gowns Reese Witherspoon and Hallie Berry wore. …And none of them wore red.

Nicole Kidman next to Keith Urban made him seem hobbit-sized.  She needed to wear flats.  And Warren Beatty is getting really old.  I couldn’t really understand what he was saying, but it was sweet he was so complimentary of his wife… (asks Bern what her name is)… Annette Bening.

I think Christian Bale had a fake beard on and I was waiting for someone to pull it off his face.  It was just… freaky.  I think James Franco pulling it off would have brought some life back into the show.

Gah, pull off that beard!  Someone!  Anyone!  Why is Christian Bale talking so much and I don’t understand what he’s saying. *blinkblink*

How long is this show?

Oh yes, and I was glad it was a big night for lesbians.  They didn’t really win any catagories, but they were there! …just sayin

I think Melissa Leo’s speech was the sweetest and I loved that she won.  Good for Ms. Leo!

Helena Bonham Carter gets more beautiful as she ages.  Did you all notice that?  I saw her in the audience and thought, woo baby, when did she get so pretty? (Googles her age… OMG, she’s 44?!  I mean it – we 40’ish women are getting hotter and hotter.)

Everyone was shaking  too.  They must have been keeping the theater cold because everyone kept shaking so much.  Seriously, if you recorded the show, go back and watch how much the women were shivering whenever they went up on stage.  I’m sure it was nerves, but I don’t recall that much shivering in the past shows.

I’d like to also say, “Never wear all white if you have a big head.”  Javier Bardem and Josh Brolin walked out and I thought I was watching “Bobble-heads Live!”

Anne Hathaway and Gwyneth Paltrow both don’t sing too badly.  Hmm…

And they had Smile sung by Celine Dion for the “in memory” section.  Did you all know Charlie Chaplin wrote that song?  I’m sure you did.  It was a lovely section, but it was around two hours and some minutes into the show and I had already dozed off around three times.

Lena Horne!  Oh man, I loved her singing Stormy Weather.  They could have replaced the original song numbers with simply her singing that whole song and it would have made the music section so much better.

Again, why did Randy Newman win?

This show was so boring. What happened to the hip and young show with these two hip and young hosts?  It wasn’t very hip, young, or much of anything.  I aged watching it, like a few years.

OMG, Colin Firth won!  The Kings Speech won!  Yay, I can go to bed now.

Really, I was looking over my notes and I actually scribbled that down:  “Yay – it’s over!”  *cries*

Anyhoo, I’m glad I watched the Oscars and for the winners who won – congratulations!  I think they got it right.  Next time, maybe they’ll add in some awesome dance numbers or something.

Blogging out!