I have been writing music again.  (I write lots of notes.)


(My music is in two folders and this one is a mess.)

I was writing some books for awhile.  (I won’t show you those lying on a bed.)  And then, I starting writing songs.  And then… I started writing more chapters and rearranging a novel I wrote (two actually) that I didn’t like and they needed a lot of revision.  But then… I started recording and writing this song.  I really enjoyed playing my guitar and writing music.

What I’m saying is:  I don’t know sometimes if I’m a songwriter or a novelist.  I go back and forth, and because I never stay on one thing for very long it makes for lots of bouncing around.

I am probably bi-polar or something like that.  I know it happens.  I watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and realize I do show certain manic tendencies.

But, enough of that.


Frumpy Face  is bored with my rambling

So, I was writing music again.  And, I found some songs I recorded and never placed on SoundCloud.  I wrote this song that I really liked, and then I wrote another that brings back ‘not so pleasant’ memories because I wrote it for someone.

However –  and that is a big HOWEVER – I played the song and re-recorded it and I felt very free.  It didn’t effect me the way it did when I first wrote it.  It’s merely a pretty good song that I wrote.  I’m glad it was inspired to be written.

I suppose I am past the past?

Maybe I’m just talking rapidly and going on with how free and over I am of this person because I’m really not over this person and I’m really not free, and I’m just having a manic episode.

(-__-) …


Anyhoo, as I was earlier writing I’m just unsure.  I’m unsure about a lot of things these days.

I realized why.  Why I feel so manic and unsure and on edge.

I’m a creative person living in a very non-creative world.  I am trapped in a 40 hour a week job world.  I’m a free spirit who is trapped in the confines of a world where you have to do the same thing every day.

Creative people feel trapped quite often.  It’s because to live and make a decent living you have to work over time and have two jobs and keep working.  When you have responsibilities that’s what you have to do. People depend on you doing your job.

And so, creative people – us writers, and musicians and artists feel always unsure, on edge, on the precipice of breaking.

It’s difficult being creative and having to make a living via non-creative endeavors.  I still work with content writing, but it pays very little for the time you put into it.  And, you are still writing for the most part about things you have no interest in writing about.

My son told me something very nice the other day.  I felt like I couldn’t write anything from the content writing site.  Like, I just forgot how to write.  And he told me, “It’s not that you are a bad writer, it’s that you just don’t write that sort of stuff.  You are a good writer of what you enjoy writing.”

Someone asked me to write poetry the other day.  I can’t just write.  I can’t just put on my writing cap and write.  I need inspiration.  I need a muse.  I need to “feel” something to write well.  If I remove the feelings then writing becomes the same as that 40-hour-a-week job.  It’s something I do to make a paycheck, but it’s not something of “me.”

Writing is very much a part of my soul.  This is, I think, how us creative types work.  We are inspired and thus create.

I think that’s why I’ve felt so on edge.  I can’t afford to do what I love all the time.

It’s okay.  I know I’m just rambling and complaining and it doesn’t help.

I just wonder if there are others out there who feel this way.  I am sure there are.   You feel just a bit trapped. You feel like some days you’ll just break.  You feel like that little hamster on a wheel just spinning round and round, and you’re going nowhere.

It’s okay.  Some days take a breath, maybe go outside, and then be inspired and do what you love when you do have the time.  That’s what I’m doing today. I’m sitting at my computer and creating a little music and writing a bit on my blog, and possibly re-arranging some more of those chapters.

Enjoy your day.  It’s going to be okay. 😉






Work, Jobs, and Making a Living

This isn’t really about any of the stuff in the title.  The title of this blog post is what is the outcome of my every day to try and pay bills.  That’s what I’ve been trying very hard to do.  I’m not very good at that part of my life because I’m a horrible employee.  I don’t mean I don’t show up for work, or I’m late, or I don’t give the job my all.  I’m just not very committed.  (I had six different jobs in 2016, and five or six in 2017.)

I realize in my life I’m not very committed in just about everything I do.

It’s about to become another year.  I spent last year struggling with so many things.  The year before… amazingly, I did the same thing – struggled.  I’m figuring out that I live my life in the same destructive pattern.

I’ve considered changing.  I really need to change to make life better for me and my kids.  I’m pretty destructive.  I can be very self-destructive in relationships, friendships, and family.

I stared at myself in the mirror.

I mean, I really, really stared.

(Wow, I have a lot of wrinkles.)

I realized I don’t look the same.  I don’t mean the natural occurrence of aging.  I mean, when I look in my eyes I don’t see the same soul.  My soul looks very worn out.  It looks very lost.  I looked very empty.

Everyone I love has noticed that my soul looks very dull.  I used to be a bright light.  I remember when my soul was a bright light.  It actually used to be so bright that I could feel the light shining painfully from behind my smile.  I know that might sound weird.

Of course, sometimes someone who is completely happy on the outside, could be crumbling horribly on the inside.  I think, I might have been crumbling slowly on the inside.

I’ve lost my way somewhere, and I’m not sure I can find it again.  I need to.   It’s detrimental that I find it if I want to live the next half of my life well.

I hope in sharing about losing a soul you all will stop and take a long look in the mirror and figure out if your soul is healthy or not.

We feed our soul every day with every thought and word.  We feed our soul in how we treat others and how we treat ourselves.  We feed our soul in every little thing we put inside and every little bit we give out.

We, as we age, need to feed our soul with an open mind and looking at the bigger picture.  We need to read and keep growing.  We need to let things go and move on.  We need to laugh, and love, and smile.  We need to stand outside and actually take in the air, inhale it through the nostrils, deep and into our lungs.  We need to look at how truly beautiful everything is around us.  We need to watch how birds, squirrels, wildlife lives.  We need to listen to children and how they speak without worrying over decorum.  We need to watch the solitude as it passes.

I realized my soul has been kind of sickly.  I placed things that didn’t matter in my soul.  Our mind is our soul.  What we place in our thoughts effects our soul the most.

And so, I hope as this year changes over I finally change into the person I know I can be.  That healthy soul that is a blessing and brightness to those around, so that they too can be brighter.

That’s my new year resolution, I suppose.  I never have new year resolutions, and so that is one thing I will do different.

I resolve to feed my soul with those things which will make it healthy.

I hope you all the best 2018!  Be blessed and be bright!




Alpha and Beta and C

Do you know that commercial where there are around three or four people saying, “See ME?”  “See me and know that I’m… something or other.”

Alive?  I’m not sure.  And they are trying to sell this medication, for moderate to severe plaque psoriasis (a skin ailment).

That has nothing to do with what I’m about to write.  Really, it doesn’t.

It’s just I think it’s a silly commercial.  I’m not sure why people with psoriasis are singled out as people not seen.  I’m pretty sure that’s a common occurrence with just about everyone on this planet – the ‘not being seen’ part, that is.

I also know a few people with this ailment and they look perfectly normal like everyone else.  So, I don’t really “get” this commercial’s audience.

But, it is a memorable commercial.  I will give it that.



C? ^__^

We’re all jumping around saying, “See me?”  “Do you see what I just did?”  “I’m a good person.”  “Look at me.”  “Notice me.”  “…Love me.”

Do you get that feeling?  I mean, just have kids and you’ll see this about human beings overwhelmingly quickly.

Or, you can stop and just look in a mirror.

I feel like that’s what I’m doing with my writing.  I’m jumping around and trying to get people to notice what I write and read it.  “See me?”  “See me and know I have lots of words to share with you peoples of the world!”

It almost sounds maniacal.  *cue laughter*

But, I really do need people to read my writing.  Writer’s really need that if they want to live as a writer and not just hope they have a time-consuming hobby.


And so, if you’ve read this far this is what I’m getting at:

I’m looking for Beta or Alpha readers for my novels.  It’s so that if I would have done this maybe five years ago when I had hundreds and thousands of people reading my stuff, then I’d have a chance.  But, I waited and I keep feeling impatient.  That long period of no laptop was like I fell in a hole.

So then, I need a reader for these books:

Tesday Will Get You Killed (humor, lesbian undertones, and friendship, and a bit of sci-fi – nearly complete, WIP)

Lamia (lesbian romance, humor and fantasy – WIP)

The Vampire’s Paradigm (darker, dystopian, fantasy – multiple book series – complete, but completely being revised)

That Girl Band (possible TV show script or novel, dramedy, romance, mystery, human interest – complete)

The New Pet in the Basement (erotica, lesbian romance, suspense, thriller, psychological drama – complete)

Please PM me if you’re interested.  Thank you!


Werewolf for Halloween

Hey all, I wrote a short story quite awhile back: maybe 15 years ago.  It was titled Werewolf of Tupelo.  I decided to post it at my fictionpress site for Halloween since there’s a werewolf and all.

I’ll tell you a little something:  When I was a kid growing up I used to love the old black & white movies about Dracula, the Werewolf, Frankenstein, and the Mummy.  Boris Karloff, Lon Chaney, and Lon Chaney Jr.  They would actually scare me back then.  Now… not so much.  But as a kid, I used to be scared.

I was never brave, and would hide in my closet with the light on, fearful of creatures that might attack in the night.  I was terrified a hand would creep up from under my bed and pull me down to hell or something.  I was really freaked out and that probably started my problems with insomnia.

Well, the creatures that did attack, back when I was a kid weren’t very paranormal or mythological beasts.  Mine were much more real.  I think those type of creatures are the scariest in this world.

But I’ll tell you in those old movies, it was just something about the lighting, make-up, music, and the build-up it was so well done it did scare me.

Later, I would be terrified by the more gory George Romero films like the 1968, Night of the Living Dead.  I had so many nightmares.  Those followed me through my teen years and I still have a fear of having a limb chewed off my body.

Probably my biggest scares were the Italian and European horror flicks with Vincent Price, Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee.  Those were so terrifying.  I still have trouble watching those early B rated horror flicks of the 60s and 70s.  That was the apex of shiver-filled terror for movies.

My kids laugh at my lack of bravery, but really those are just so eerie.  I think the eerie, creepy, skin-crawling factor and music is what gets me.  I also can’t stand the sounds of someone in pain.  Even in a movie, hearing someone being tortured bothers me so much I have to leave the room.

I can’t sit through gore.  It just amazes me people can make those kind of movies.  I mean, it’s pretty awesome they can do it, but that is not something I could do. And the make-up?  My gosh, amazing!  American Horror Story?  No way. Haha

For me, real terror is the inability to escape.  The fear that you can’t leave your present state of being or feeling trapped.  Personally, that… well that and dismemberment and maiming… but yeah, not being able to leave a place I desperately want to leave is probably my greatest fear.

Anyhoo, I hope you all have a safe and happy time getting tricks, treats, or scary things this Halloween.  Take care and be safe!




The New Book


Okay, so I’m taking a leap here and about to publish something that I have considered using a pseudonym for, but the thing is, only about the first 1/6 of the book is erotic, the rest is a personal study and growth, a mystery, and also suspenseful thriller, plus a love story.  It is much like Crime and Punishment.  You have this horrendous crime, but the rest of the book is dealing with the horrendous crime.  Not to say, I am anywhere near the writer Fyodor Dostoevsky (my idol), is, but I’m just saying….  I wrote a wildly long book.

The book  is called, The New Pet in the Basement.

The book is in three parts and around 210,000 words.  Crime and Punishment was around 212,000 words, and seven or eight parts.

I keep making this comparison because I noticed I write a lot.  ^_^;;;;;

Okay, well here is the synopsis:

The New Pet in the Basement

An erotic psychological suspense thriller.  What started as a game became an awakening to a life she never knew she was capable of living.  Tamarind Torres is manipulated to the point of breaking.  Facing the demons of her past, she searches for answers and finds out things about herself she never knew or expected.  What started as an abduction, became a seduction, until the wild and deadly conclusion where love is found in the most unexpected place.

A book that takes you to the point you feel you are living in the protagonist’s shoes.  You, the reader, feel yourself slipping down the slippery slope of manipulation, unsure what is real and what is fantasy.  So caught up in this world of erotic pleasure, that when it suddenly stops you crash hard, and begin to question what was real and what was not.

Tamarind Torres is a 27-year-old philosophy major.  She’s half way through her Master’s Thesis and the bills are piling up.  She only grows more depressed, and since high school has struggled with alcohol addiction, and continues drinking her money away. 

Her dad died when she was 16 and she’d always struggled with the abandonment of the one she depended on and loved.  Her mother became more distant until Tam had no one to talk to and no way to cope.  She found her coping mechanism in the bottle, much to the dismay of her family and friends.

Feeling judged and alone, she leaves town, but is stopped by a phone call by Richard Meyerson, the handsome and rich neighbor, and middle son of the richest family in town.  He wants to have a drink before leaving town, but what ends up as a quick stop at the bar ends up in an unexpected abduction.

And then she meets his wife, Julia Broussard Meyerson, the girl she bullied through two years of high school, and things begin to change. The Meyerson’s make her a monetary deal she would be crazy to refuse.

Julia is a psychiatrist, but hiding a very deep secret about herself.  No one knows what really goes on behind those dark blue eyes of Julia, but Tamarind slowly begins to figure it out. 

By the end, Julia and Tamarind will unexpectedly find out things about themselves they never would have imagined.

The first part begins with the Manipulation, the second delves into the Investigation into what was real, and the third  will unravel a beautiful love story between two women hiding their true selves for years, until the final unhindered and deadly climax.

Sometimes, things are better left hidden in the basement.

What do you all think?  Not something you’d read?  I don’t know.  I enjoyed writing it around eight years ago.  I realized it had something worth revising, and since I lost everything from my laptop almost five years ago, when I finally got a laptop again, and found all my stories, I decided it was time to work on these stories and just start publishing.


Books and Such

I’ve written a few novels (six or more, actually) in my life.  Writing a book is truly a wasteful endeavor.  You are simply spinning your wheels to write something no one should read.  Or, so you think….

You write and write for months and years a book.  It’s finished and you look over the story and realize… this book sucks.  What was I thinking?  It’s got too much of this, and not enough of that, and what the hell did I just waste my time writing?  What the hell did I just spend 8,640 hours on?  This could actually take another 17,280 or more hours stuck in research and development – my laptop.

All that research and effort, and time I don’t have, and the constant mind-altering state of envisioning the scene and realizing it doesn’t make sense.  It makes it so that you are never truly present with the people in your life, because your mind is on that stupid scene. That scene that just became a giant plot hole.  You’ve just written a really dumb book!

The character is uneven.  I just think this character makes some really lousy decisions for her life.  Are they even realistic?  Are they likable?  All these peripherals like cell phones, and clothing choices, and remembering names, hair, eye color, height, and remembering if what was mentioned in chapter two was mentioned later in chapter 20, or vice versa.

Time gaps!  Oh my goodness!  The month, the season, the time of day, and do they all coordinate to keep the reader in the story, or have you just lost them because in one chapter it was spring and the next it’s winter, or in one its morning and suddenly it’s dusk.

What the hell were you thinking?

I have all this fear.


Fear is my greatest enabler for never stepping out and trying to be published.

And so, I wrote these dumb books.

It’s so silly.  I actually enjoyed writing them.  I really did.  I fell in love with some of my characters – who were really a part of me tucked away in there.  All my darkest parts and all my brightest.  Some characters, well they were people I’ve met and observed, or thought over after watching a show or the news.  Some are like distant relatives you meet and think, “they have the traits of a great character in a book.”

We all have so many layers inside.  We have layers we will never discover.  It takes years and years of constant searching.  Madeline L’Engle once wrote one of my favorite quotes:

“The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the other ages you’ve been.”

I enjoy writing the more recent books, because the more I read and wrote in my life, the easier it became.  The more enjoyable it became.  I had more life to share and write about.

And so, if you write.  If you write books, or stories, or poetry, or anything really.  If you love to read books.  If the written word is your passion, step out.

Don’t let fear hold you back.

I let it rule over me, much too much.

And honestly, over half are worth throwing in a dumpster, but the other few are quite nice.

Please visit my stories.  I’ve decided to update weekly.  I write everything from humor to drama, fantasy to horror and suspense, and even a little crime, erotica, and romance. Mostly, I love a good soapy romance.

I hope at the end of the book I told a good story.  I hope if you read that you will leave a comment or message me and let me know how I can improve.  I appreciate good critiques.

Thank you for reading and I hope you the best possible day!



Quickie Update

It looks like I might just have a laptop to write again! Woo!!!

Hey y’all, its been awhile, and now I’m smiling.  🙂

I don’t have a whole lot to discuss.  I’ve been doing a little binge watching on Netflix, some N64 game playing (Worms Armageddon and Mario 64), and a lot of working (around 58 hours a week).   Since, I am now in between jobs, I thought I’d drop in and write something on anything.

Let’s see, the last time I updated was in 2015.  WHAT?!?!?!  Wow, that’s a long time not to write.  O_O

I’ve been reading a little more of the Gnostic Bible and ancient writings.  I bought a Tibetan singing bowl and it sounds really cool.  I’m going to definitely buy a couple more in varying sizes in the future.  Other than that, life is moving slow for me.

Recently, my dad passed away.  It’s strange.  I loved him, but barely knew him.  He was a pretty good guy.  I think I got my mustachio love from my dad – who always had a mustache!  I guess it’s like the saying, “You don’t miss something until its gone.”  That’s how I feel with my dad’s passing.  Rest in peace, dad! 🙂

*Moment of Silence*

Okay, shows and movies I watched recently:

The 100 and Agents of Shield.  Has anyone seen these shows?  Okay, Octavia is my new favorite character of any show!  You have to watch 100 and see for yourself.

I really enjoyed the Wonder Woman movie.  It was pretty good, and I unexpectedly liked Steve Trevor.

I also started watching JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure with my son.  Hah, this is a wild and fun series!  If you like anime, this is a good one to watch.

With the singing bowl I bought myself a couple of CD’s:  Barry Manilow and The Carpenters.  I’m pretty old school with my taste.

I also started teaching myself calligraphy.  It’s a very peaceful hobby.  (I think I’m not too bad.)

I guess I’ll try and figure out what to write in the near future.  I hope to update my stories at “Val’s Stories” site and start writing again this year.

Have a beautiful and blessed day, amigos!  Adios for now! ^_^/


Why I’m Not Blogging….. grrrrrrrrrrrr

Hey, just an update for anyone who visits my blog.  My laptop broke.



And then my daughter gave me her old lapto

I am seriously typing as th(TH NOOOOOOO ISj






keyboard is messed up. on the new laptop she gave me

Seriously, I am just leaving what it does to what I write.  I have an entire paragraph and page disappear because this keyboard is wonky

Nevermind.  Okay, so I’m not posting because I need a new laptop or compu..



I’ll end here before everything disaPPEARS.


New Page: Autobiography Beginnings and Forward Progress…

I realized whether I’m writing on my blog, working on a novel, jotting down some poetry or writing a new song, I love to write.  I’m one of those folks born with a need to share what’s on my mind and I have this crazy creativity that needs to get out of my system.  I’m self-absorbed or self-indulgent like that, but then its why we have writers.  Writers share a message and others are free to read and like, or read and reject or ignore; but we are gifted to write.  There is that part of creativity in writers.

I have been needing to write down my memoirs for awhile.  It was bound to happen and so I have a new page, Autobiography Beginnings, that I hope you will enjoy reading.  I’m working on this book and will add the chapters as I write them.

Today, I will place this excerpt from the book beginnings Chapter Two titled, “Forward Progress,” because it was originally written as a blog post and it fit in Chapter Two quite easily.

Forward Progress

This could mean many things depending on who is progressing and who is moving forward. My life has been defined by a spiritual progress. I went from small child dependant on an omniscient God, to a child who hated God, and then to a child who questioned God, and then to a totally accepting adult with a dogmatic and unbendable belief system (falsely called faith), and up to now where I am a progressive follower of wherever God takes me and shows me truth through the lens of love.

Now, that last part in my journey may seem too hokey and rose-colored glasses, but I know that I see clearer looking toward the light when I keep my shades on. I don’t want to be blinded by the light.

God, the Great Creator, the one inside and outside and within and without, is defined by humans throughout time. The forward progression of our thoughts on God is decided by culture and time period.

God is viewed through the lens of how we view our world. God becomes defined by those who speak the loudest about God. Thus, we can have some real asshole beliefs about God, when in reality we are simply viewing God through a pile of whatever came out of the wrong end of a donkey.

If you are raised sitting around a campfire and listening to the Shaman share his view of God, then you will probably believe God to be whatever this Shaman said. If you are raised in an organized religion you will probably believe whatever said religion and preacher up front tells you of God.

Rarely, do we step out and progress further in our God definition than what we’ve been taught. We get secure and find comfort in having a fully explained God, neatly placed in the box of our religion and upbringing.

But then, there are those who step out of the box, leave the cave, leave the building, leave the doctrines of tradition, and the authority who states, “that’s just how it’s always been,” and start to search for God outside the box.

This was me when I not only came out of the closet, but also came out of my little spiritual box.

This can be called, “Forward Progress.” In a culture it brings about new religions and new governments and new laws, and revolutions; but, on a personal level as one human being, it can bring about all types of life changes and life directional shifts and upheavals, or a revolution of thought. This is a new chapter in a life.

It brings about change – either for good or for bad. But then, good or bad is decided by whom?

Who decides what is best for you? God? Whose god? Questioning outside the box leads you to even more questions. You realize the world is one infinite question after another, and you either keep pondering or jump back into the box, or find another neatly put together box and jump in that one. (I think that’s why you’ll find many diehard Catholics become Mormons or a Protestant going to Catholicism. You see a lot of box jumpers.)

Who IS GOD, then becomes, and became, my question. When we begin to ask who we are to God, we then need to ask who is God to us. Who is God to…me?

In this day and age, early 21st century, if the world is progressing forward then we are at a time when wars, hate, lines drawn, societies building walls, humans developing anti-equality laws, relationships, and cultures have to say, “We learned from the past, and now move forward to a more enlightened future.”

Do we progress forward? Do we make good changes or bad changes?

I believe as I earlier stated about how an individual jumps back in the box or chooses a different box, rather than exploring a more enlightened path, our countries and societies do the same thing. It’s why we have Neo-cons in the United States and why we have new abusive and violent laws against gays in other countries like Russia and Uganda. We step forward in kindness and then step backward into hate.

When I earlier stated that I began to see the world through a love colored lens I realized I could not step backward into hate or jump from one box to another. I was finally free from that box and was ready to explore the world in a loving and caring way. If I’m being loving and caring then I won’t be judgmental and hate-driven. I can’t tell you for a fact, dogmatically that this religion is better than this other religion, but I can, for a fact, say that God is real to me and people are here to stay and so I either get along with them or live in a box.

Let’s look at the God picture for a second: I have to ask, “Is God good for us or bad?” Who defines good and bad? Is God good or bad? Perhaps that’s the first question we should ask. If God is infallible and constant, infinite and timeless, creator of all, then what does that have to do with good or bad? It just “IS.” So then do we really care if God is good or bad?

This creation has good and bad things – evil things at times when you consider cruelty and inhumane actions. Is this how we find God – through humanity? …The predator/prey example? Destructive forces of nature in constant turmoil and constant climactic change?

Well, there is no good answer to give us any real definition. We could stand our ground on one definition, but then what source do we go to in finding solidity to this conclusion? If we are progressing forward then we don’t stop on a definition. We don’t get comfy despite the little box we found that has a really soft blanket inside. There is NO SUCH BOX THAT HAS EVERY ANSWER INSIDE.

And, if we stop then how do we explain the progression of history on humankind and creatures alike? We don’t still live in caves and even if you don’t believe in macro-evolution you do realize there has been myriad micro-evolutionary changes in our world proven scientifically.

Forward progress is real and a must, for cultures, societies, and for us as individuals.

Our culture has constantly changed. Our technology has constantly changed. Our communities and political systems and those lines of power have constantly changed. Life and livelihood keeps progressing and moving forward. Movements have come and gone. New religions and ideologies sprout up and then die out.

Our view of God, in those same transient ways, also change.

And then there is me. I have read the Bible for over 30 years over and over again. I saw the words one way 30 years ago, and then another way 20 years ago, and even differently 10 years ago, and now everything is so different in how I perceive the wording. Did the writing change? No. (I read the same version.)

I ended up progressing and moving forward. I stopped listening to what others told me. I got quiet and began to listen to that small inner voice. I say God spoke to my heart. I opened my eyes. I finally listened.

I know when I look at other human beings that God is not them. God is outside humankind, and yet within us each, but only when we notice it inside. God is outside a book of words. God is outside every individual and yet dwells with each one of us. Some seek and some don’t care. It’s not a contest.

Inspiration is fully given to anyone – any old Joe or Joanne on the street. I see a smiling clerk at the store who tells me to have a good day from the very core of her soul and mean it, and I am blessed by God because of her being inspired to share this joy inside. We are ALL able to be inspired by God and have an inspired word at any given moment.

To say that your religious box, neatly put together centuries ago, by those who decided and spoke the loudest is the only box to use is a lie. “This is our unchanging box.” Others come along and look in the box and don’t touch the contents and keep passing it along completely intact.

I came from a Christian fundamental; grace alone, infallible Bible-only, inerrant truth, type of box of religion. This was the only box I dared to look inside. One day God told me, “STOP.” Stop and look up. Go outside that box. And this began my forward progress.

Boxes are fine for a time, but they eventually fall apart like all things made of cardboard. Getting a bigger and better and shinier box to place all those little things inside doesn’t change the fact you cannot progress inside a box.

God will not ever, nor will God ever, stay in a box created and manufactured by human beings. When you realize this it’s the first step in truly knowing God. Not that you ever truly will, but you are on the journey finally.

It’s like children and their toy boxes. Eventually, they move away from that small group of toys and go off to college and see the world (unless, you happen to be a character in Toy Story).


I like Jesus and the idea of Jesus. There are so many schools of thought as to whether he existed or not. I don’t think I really care one way or the other. I like the message of Jesus: “Love God and love others.” “Know who you are.” “Seek God and you shall find God.” “Care and be generous.” “Don’t judge.” “Be true to yourself.” “Be a light in a dark world.” “Always help when able.” I mean, these are things that we should do as human beings and in this way we are God on earth.

Love: Could you imagine (like the song by John Lennon) if we were all guided by love that there would be no more wars, no more boundaries, no more hate, and no more laws. Equality would never be questioned because it would be a given. Judgment is unnecessary because grace and mercy would abound. There would be no prisons. No poverty because everyone would help out another. Peace. There would be peace for once.

This was the message of Jesus, but we always draw lines and we always place our boxes there on the front line. We so love our boxes. I know this will never happen because humans will always behave as humans. There will be no heeding this message of Jesus.

But, I ask YOU – the person reading this – to leave your box. YOU start the forward progression because if only one person starts, and then another starts, soon we will have a world of people progressing in this path of peace. God isn’t in any box – God transcends boxes.

Peace be with you.